“Assertiveness Training for Unattractive Women”


January 18, 2019

Let me tell you unattractive women

and the rest of you unattractive women that pretend

like you DON’T think you are Unattractive. 
It’s not about your looks you know..
That’s not why you are mistreated and disregarded by men. 


This has more to do with your “agreeableness” and proclivity to “comply” as a WOMAN and in particular as an unattractive woman..

If you were born with a face that’s only your mother thinks is beautiful

If you were born with a face that’s only

your mother thinks is beautiful or that people

assume easy advantage over, then you have to put aside your virtue

and that “turn the other cheek” mentality to unearth your “INNER BITCH”. 

Yes, I said inner bitch! That part of you that

you’ve repressed in hopes that people look pass your

face to find something likeable about you.

Agreeableness is not an effective strategy for getting people to like you, ESPECIALLY when you are dealing with men!

You can’t distract men from your face!!

You can’t distract men from your face by “acting” kind and sweet: you have to DEFEND yourself as an unattractive woman!!

And this mean that you allow your spine to grow, that you show people that you are unafraid and unbothered by what they think,

and you are not EASY to befriend or have sex with!!

See a lot you cowering in a corner.

You never have anything of substance to share,

you never tell a joke, or say you are proud of yourself.

You never voice a thought or string opinion about anything…

Cause you’re trying to stay invisible so sees you as a target to ridicule.


GET UP! And show the world who you are, what YOU feel about things, share your intellect, your ability to create and medicine woman ways.

Stop trying to be liked when people are offended by your looks.

You have to walk another route so that your life becomes a fantastic ride!
TAKE THE BLACK PILL

Artist/Life Coach/Medicine Woman: Salkis Re

If you need help with self improvement and/or relationships challenges, please contact me via email at salkis @iloveherart.com


“The Pressure to Look Sexy!

“The Pressure to Look Sexy”
Written by Salkis Re

Listen, I’ve been accused of being undercover feminist lesbian when I get into my cautionary rants;

the resistance usually comes from men who feel in threatening a reduction in their prospects/prey or women

who believe they are more attractive than I am which makes my message inapplicable to them…

The reoccurring theme here, the message within all of my writings is that you see the truth of how your emotions become weaponized and used against you.
The pressure to “look valuable” is real.

Blog post for SalkisRe.com


This is why we wear the form fitting clothes, plaster makeup on our faces, post selfies, wear weaves and high heels that some of can’t even walk in..
Somebody told you that you had to do this in order to be relevant and “considered”.

And MOST of us are looking like desperate fools in clown makeup and

clothing with spandex material in that that makes you assume you’ve bought the right size.

Shaming here?
No. Waking here!
Wake up to the fact that you are in a game that’s set up for you to lose,

because when you lose (of feel lost) you turn into a consumer/believer/minion

for those that make sales to help cure your low self esteem.

African Art by Salkis RE
African art by Salkis Re

What’s the truth here though?
The truth is that we are different, but different doesn’t necessarily mean better or worse; it simply means that I cannot be you and you cannot be me…

I’m interested in sisterhood.

 

I’m interested in sisterhood . Though I cried it down as an impossible task -because women are emotional conn artists- I am renewing my vision for this because it is needed.

We are sick, depressed, suicidal, impoverished in every way because we sit around telling lies to each other, initiating new recruits into old sorrows,making it seem like even the mistakes you made in your life was “all planned out before your birth”.

Where are the healers?
Where are the watchers?

 

 

Where are the CRONES to help and guide young women?
Are you sitting around to busy plucking your hormonal chin hair to care about the ones coming after you?

Looking good is a blessing and a curse for those of us who can transform to an acceptable level;

you WILL be picked, used, trophied, and discarded more than those if us who have minimal options.


African Art by Salkis RE
African Art by Salkis Re

You Can’t Quite Level Up

And the ones of who can’t quite “level up” feel that we live without luck or grace because the prospects are low,

so we go to extremes, often corrupting our health while making fool-hearty investments in so-called improvements,

and the only return you get on your alterations is laughed and more Usury than your previous looks allowed for..

So both spectrums meet pain and degradation, and the reason we do is because we do not help each other.

We rate,

categorize,

exclude,

and diminish each other’s value by forming social cliques where women

that aren’t a threat to each other just pass around lies and swap war stories…
And so it goes..
But I’m looking for my lost sheep just like Jesus did..

I’m here to help with the bitter BLACK PILL…
Carry On..

Black Women with Thick Locs
“Medicine Woman”
“Artist”
“Writer”
“Mentor”
“EMPATH”

If you need private mentoring in all matters of womanhood including health ad wellness, weightless, self esteem, life purpose, relationship advice, please reach out ay:

Salkis@iloveherart.com

There’s Nothing Special About You!

 

 

Beautiful Black Women

 

OK…
When I tell women that they are not “special”, they’re offended but this is indubitably true.
A woman stated to me that she was heart broken because her man left her for another white woman.

“Another” meaning he was previously married to one before that wife passed away.
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

Well you knew when you met him that his preference was white women because he married one,

or are you devastated because he LEFT you or because he left you for a WHITE woman?

Over sexualized black women
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
I don’t think I’ve ever met a woman who dates or is married interracially who doesn’t make an announcement about this

“unique” and  special type of relationship she has.

It’s ALWAYS a point they make even though the question if ethnicity or race is brought up.
You think you are “extra special” because a man that “shouldn’t” love a woman like you does!????!!!??!!

👉IGNORING This Message Could Result In you Spinning Your Wheels and being PLAYED Again!!

****Some of you “dime pieces” are going to have a hard time

hearing this because men “appear” to worship you…

But they don’t see you pep talking yourself and obsessing in the mirror ritualistically every single day. You assume your beauty makes you a Goddess, but did every man you faced think so too?

Didn’t Cierra get “Baby Mothered by Future??

Didn’t Beyonce is cheated on by JayZ??

Didn’t Hallie Barry lose her hearing after getting punched in her head??

🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

 

 

Pink bunny rabbit
World Renowned Artist, Author, Poet and Life Coach, Salkis Re creates beautiful paintings of little girls on canvas.

👉 See, we have to stop believing that we are the “best” anything when we come into a man’s life.

This is the game they run to stroke your fragile ego, soothe the worry and doubt

most women have about their looks, all so they can have access to you!
👉 Most people, men particularly have a “type”, and chances are high that you are

JUST LIKE MOST OTHER WOMEN he’s enjoyed sexually,

and you say the same fuccing things intellectually or and you look

the same aesthetically as every other woman he’s fell in love with!

So no my sweet, sweet daughters, you are NOT “special” :YOU ARE SIMPLY “NEW”.

Now take this BLACK PILL and wash it down with the glass of wisdom.
Carry On…

 

Black Women with Thick Locs

Who Am I?

“Medicine Woman”
“Artist”
“Author”
“Poet”
“Mentor”
“Lifecoach”
“Mother”
“The Crone”
~Salkis Re

👉If you feel you could use some private mentoring please send your questions/concerns to: salkis@iloveherart.com

 

Dating Outside Your Race Black Women?

I could join you picket line…but I won’t because part of the blame, well most of it was my doing,
for I chose to give men who I knew were not interest in me a chance.
I knew that the guys I LIKED didn’t really like me,
but I hadn’t any concrete “evidence” to substantiate my suspicions, yet and still, the situations
that by the grace of God revealed the truth, I dismissed the truth anyway.
I didn’t want to admit the truth because that would mean that in my mind,
I was acknowledging that I wasn’t good enough.
 

Watercolor Portrait Painting
“I’m a Girl!” Original Art by Salkis Re

And what’s the best way to relieve the mind of anxiety and depression: distraction!
Men pretended with me and I pretended right along with them, hoping that “proving value” by “selling myself” to an
*unmotivated buyer to begin with would somehow turn things around for me…
This what you do too.
You pretend.
You pretend you don’t see what you see.
You even pretend to be confused, but you know.
You ALWAYS know, the problem is that you do not trust in what you know because you
cannot differentiate your true self from the pretense you’ve created to get along with others.
 
Most of the time it was just a “feeling” though. In the mist of a conversation,
his mind does not seem fully engaged, and if a woman walked by that he liked,
he took the liberty to take a long and quite substantial look,
not feeling instinctively compelled to respectfully conceal his arousal from you.
 
There were other times when dates would be cancelled at the last minute
but then he’d show up at midnight to my door claiming to “miss me”,
I knew that he lied but I let him in because I wanted to feel wanted: truth be damned!
Then there were those times when holidays came around and gifts didn’t come neither the presence of his body,
probably because he was too busy stocking stuffing at “homes” of women who’s company he valued more.
And it was no buggy in my mind because
I bought my daughter all the gifts on her list which allowed me to a distraction from my feelings of inadequacy from being unwanted…

abstract portrait painting
“Powder” Original Abstract Portrait by Salkis RE

So now here you are, running from your acute ability to make poor decisions
by seeking refuge in the arms of men who do not share your genetic makeup.
You are fascinated with the “novelty” of it all. You get to even be “blacker” with him than you are
with your own brothers as you show and tell stories about what means to be a black woman in America.
And all well until you notice that he likes you a bit too much,
almost like you are trinket or an object of a fetish he has for black fresh.
And here you were thinking he is crazy about you…
Yeah he is krazy* about you…
You dismiss it though, still on somewhat of a high that a
man from another race considers you as beautiful.
 
But the truth is that you are that same woman who made agreements with men whom,
you knew were not to be trusted, not to be fucced, not to be husband or a father to your children.
Moving to another race doesn’t remove how your process and filter out your world and more importantly what you think of yourself.
You cannot run from you.
The respect and love that you desire comes when you become intimate with YOU.
It will come from black men when you have a love for your wellbeing that cannot be bought or bargained with.
Carry On…
Black Women with Thick Locs
“Spiritual Advisor”
“Artist”
“Author”
“Poet”
~Salkis Re
If you need my book good click HERE
If you Want me to mentor you, click HERE

How to Heal Your Body With The Right Man!

Something that I’ve come to know in my own journey towards physical and

emotional healing is that your emotions are responsible for disease.

The emotional body holds the feelings in place whether it be

depression,

anger,

fear,

sorrow

and it assists in creating a stable environment for those emotions to thrive and grow.

African American Art
“Please Forgive Me” Original Art by Salkis Re

 

Once your emotions have a stable atmosphere to thrive, you start to feel off balance physically,

your immune system starts to weaken and dysfunction and illness sets in.

This is why the relationships you choose are SO FREAKIN IMPORTANT to your overall health and emotional well being.

Men whom you have sex with that do not love you will affect your health.

A Man that you are in long term toxic relationship with will affect your health.

 

Lingering Sorrow is not good for your soul, it’s not good for your heart,

it’s not good for your mind…..

Decide that you will put your health ABOVE your compassion for other peoples foolery.

Decide that you will sacrifice your convenience and

instant gratification for the long term goal of longevity and vitality.

Your insulin level must be low to loose weight and to keep your hormones regulated.

 

High insulin means higher cortisol levels which is the fat storing hormone.

Stress will keep you sick and fat. Stress from junk food and junk people will keep you fat and exhausted.

You will kick yourself into early menopause along with a host of other physical imbalances…

 

Cut The Excess: ALL OF IT!!

 

Do you need a push to bring emotional and physical balance to your life again?

I am here to help you!

You can Find Me HERE

 

 

 

Butt Ugly Beauties

Awwww. Listen Linda, Listen!!

I know what it feels like, what it be like to dance with self doubt.

Everywhere you turn, there is another thing you NEED because

somebody is saying that you have look better than what you are in order to compete with…

well don’t even damn know!!

SO we buy the next gadget, the next cream, the next corset,

and the next promise that we will magically look good even for a man to fall on a sword for us…

Beautiful Black Women

I know gorgeous women… I mean women who’s stock remains high whether or not they have clothes on.

THEY ARE DROP DEAD GORGEOUS 

And guess what they also are?

They are doubtful of their value, challenged by their perception of their own self worth.

Questioning themselves like a broken record as they wonder if they are truly deserving of the THINGS THEY GET!!!

Can you imagine having that forking problem???

You get what you want with ease, but a whisper in your head keeps

saying it’s an accident or a fluke that you receive what you receive…

You are so beautiful that men that you like a pet, they are so insecure around you that they

think you are incapable of telling the truth or being faithful to them…

Imagine that….

Stacked Those Chips On Your Shoulder

 

 

Black artLow Self esteem escape ver few people who are actually adults..

By the time you can go to the corner store by yourself or take your road test for your drivers license,

you’ve stacked up enough insecurities to create a stairway to heaven…

Fixed and confident in all the degradation you’ve accumulated over the years.

You don’t want to think of yourself  jacked up, but that is what you are thanks to society.

 

Its Time to Die

Time to put to bed those thoughts. Time to die and be reborn again… It takes a little death you know.

A death to transform into what you want to become,

a death to assert what you want to feel like you deserve.

This goes for love OR ANYTHING you want in life too.

 

You Are Programmed!

You are programmed to wait for a “qualifier” to feel like you can claim the good life.

You need the degree to feel smart.

You need the crowd to feel important.

You need a man’s love to feel esteem.

You need your parents to be proud of you to feel like a winner.

And on and on and on……….

 

Three things you need to know and adopt in your life transformation..

No ones Opinion of you is LAW or the ABSOLUTE TRUTH

You Will Always Have a Choice to Accept or Regret What People Think of You.

Most People You know is battling their own self esteem issues, so they CANNOT help you.

 

 

 

 

 

Some immediate suggestions:

Turn off the T.V..

Unplug from social media.

Find a hobby

Find a way to help other people…

Come out of your own head and let your ego starve a little bit…

We often feel miserable because we are self centered and need constant

reassurance when the attention we want to receive is not matched to what we actually get..

You Are enough!!

If you are healthy, you are blessed.

IF you have sight, you are blessed.

If you can read, you are blessed.

If you can call you mother today, you are blessed…

Carry On….

To reach me for private questions or products and services find me HERE

My email your questions and concerns to: Salkis@iloveherart.com

 

 

 

“Label Makers, Label Breakers”

Written by Salkis Re

Self esteem challenges can happen in people who are attractive,

in people with higher IQs, in people with money, in people who are religious etc.
You’d be surprised at the type of people who really emotionally fragile out here.
Don’t let appearances fool you…

I remember a “Guy Friday” I had working for me at my salon back in the day.

He was dark skin an older man, but you could tell he was extremely handsome

in his youth because he still had six pack abs and pretty white teeth.
He come in a few times a week and clean my shop for a six pack of beer,

pork rinds and on Fridays, I threw in a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken just to see his face light up.

 

beautiful black women

He didn’t want much, he didn’t need much really because of his lifestyle.

But he wasn’t ashamed of his standard of living.

He was quick-witted, wisdom filled, and his sense of humor would shortened any difficult day I’d have.

I remember him inviting me to his home that he’d often call his “Palace”.

He was so proud that he had this home and he often told stories of his lovers tryna lay claim to it by leaving panties and toothbrushes behind..lol

So I went to see the palace, and it turned out to be an old, tiny,

Southern Georgia shack! He had a dirty couch on the patio with a rickety table next to it to prop his beer.

He called it his “seating area” lllllmao.
I asked, “You entertain your hoes here Millified?”
“Yes Boss Lady, haha ha ha”, he said with his raspy voice.

 

He opened the door and invited me inside. The floor boards screeched and some of them lifted when we took a step.

I was scared I was going to fall through the floor, so he took my hand and we zig-zagged through the living.

He chuckled looking at my “wtf” face. But he still wasn’t fazed by my frowning giggles.

The floor of the entire house was on an incline, you could have slid right into the kitchen if the floor was wet.

The walls were painted with dirt. A few water bugs came out to see who was in the house too.

He had plastic lawn cheers in front of a 52 inch TV. That TV was the focal piece of the house and would be the reason all the ladies didn’t want to leave his chateau, hahaha!

He said he had cable and he’d make some squash casserole and fried chicken if I ever wanted to come hang out on Sunday after church.

We went to his bedroom and he had a queen size mattress on the floor that looked like he pulled it out a land fill,

and the bedroom closet was almost as small as a medicine cabinet.
His bathroom couldn’t hold two people at the same time; you could literally shit, shower and shave all in one cause it was so damn tiny!

He said he was ready to whip up a batch of red Kool Aid if I was thirsty and motioned him not to bother.

When the tour was done, I looked at him in disbelief.

I wanted him to see how disgusted I was,

but he continued to look at me and laugh.

 

He was unfazed by my distain, and I showed my distain because I knew he didn’t give a shit what I thought.
He was proud of himself. He was proud of who he was. He had “pretty teeth” so to him he was a “pretty boy”..lllllmao

He was one of the few people I’ve met that was just unbothered by people’s opinions,

he stated what he was and that was all his heart and mind had room for.

The rest of us have so much more than him, but we disregard it for the perpetual fear that others may feel we are not good enough.

Abstract Portait Painting

Your self esteem is built on a weaker foundation than his one room shack!

All while you look good, you work a so-called “good job”.

You can save for vacation and occasionally splurge on nonessential things,

but you still are afraid of what people think of you.
You don’t take a chance, because your thoughts of failure plaque you without rest.

You have their degrees, their licenses and certificates but still feel invalid..

Your Perception of who you are has been “Given” to you.

That is why you are not empowered, and that is why you live so unsure of yourself in spite of all your accolades.

My Guy Friday stayed happy, even with what I classified as an impoverished lifestyle, he had a mentality of wealth.

Maybe that was the reason he remained so attractive and charismatic.

He could have been more I suppose had he taken advantage of the education system, maybe he would be more than hustler.

But that was my opinion of him, and one he didn’t share in…

He wasn’t intimidated by others who had more.

He talked to everybody, and free beer and free meals were the regular thank you gifts he received for his humor and charismatic optimism.

So what will you do?

Continue to live in fear of not being good enough,

not living good enough,

not being attractive enough,

not having enough money to be enough?

When will you arrest those hypothesizing thoughts of imaginary restraints?

When you say fuck it, this is what I am and I’m fabulous as is???
You can do it right now.

You don’t need to kneel before a Queen,

or get a certificate in the mail,

or have an engagement ring on your finger to claim your right to feel fantastic about yourself today!!

Make the shift.
Make the decision..
And be what YOU say you are…

“Medicine Woman”
~Salkis Re

 

IF YOU NEED TO TALK: CLICK HERE

Fight Elegantly!

Decisions based solely on emotion NEVER stick.

You may be able to garner their pity and remorse for a little while,

but eventually that person goes back to his/her old ways after their emotions have settled back down,

This is why men feel sorry about about cheating when they get caught, and after the dust settles,

they are back out there at it again.

Black women are getting pimped out of their vaginas by everybody,

black men, white men, even other women

people generally do not change unless they experience some

tremendously emotional event that breaks the patterns within their nervous system.

Thick Locs

 

For the most part, we are all fixed as adults. Fixed in what we believe about ourselves,

how we perceive love, how we quantify our value.

Relationships are about the decision to share a life with someone as they are,

and with your love and encouragement,

you can “Influence” them to become “Improved” partners IFFFFFFFFFFF that is what HE desires to be…..

 

black love

Black women are emotionally exploited by everybody because our pathologies are well known and easy to recognize

while others enjoy living with the ambiguity of their depression and low self esteem whiling concealing

pharmaceutical remedies for their suicidal thoughts properly fitted garments, scantily clad pics or perfectly

coiffed hair that serve to disguise their emotional dysfunction.

 

abstract art

Our pathology includes the admiration and support of anybody who do not resemble ourselves,

and the admiration and support of people who mock, mimic and make fun of us.

We are enemies of each other perception based on “collective” biases that are based on propaganda and indoctrination.

 

Redeem yourself. Pull yourself up from the muck and Myer….

Divorce yourself from anything or anyone who’s opinions are self serving and decide that a

feeling is not a truth unless you start living in agreement with it,

and that goes for yourself or anyone else…

 

If you need to talk with me privately, find me HERE

 

Stop Playing Small!

Some of us are wasting away at life.
The Great Pretenders I call them.
You are Afraid to make a mistake, and afraid to get your heart broken again.
So you wallow in denial of what you want

AND deny your responsibility in the results you’ve gotten so far.
Everything you could have been will die with you; that is the life you are living right now…

 

 

 

Goddess art

I refuse to conform.

To cower down into obscurity.

I wasn’t born to live an uneventful life, and neither are you!

I wasn’t born for people to have something to shame and ridicule for my nappy hair and big lips, and neither are you!

I want born for people to tell me I’m not smart enough for what I want to have, and neither are you!

And YOU weren’t born to live in quiet desperation, to play it safe to avoid pain.

Your trauma is your SCHOOL, and you are conditioned to lead because you survived it.
But you sit back and do nothing with all that experience you have.

You prefer to wallow and feel sorry for yourself like you earn money to be upset.

 

 

Abstract portrait painting
Art by Salkis RE

 

What does it benefit you to live in fear today?
How will your life be better out of your decision not to take a chance?
People need to know that they can do it, and you might be the only example of this,

but you’ve designed life that ensure that they will NEVER meet you.

A disservice is what you create in 360 degree form when you make decisions based on fear.
Its time to GET UP.

If you Need me to assist you, I am HERE

 

 

 

 

Are You A PlaceHolder???

“Place Holders”
Written by Salkis Re
 
You think you fucked the shit outta him, yet he left you.
You think you are a dime piece, yet he left you.
You think you are the most intelligent woman he’s ever been with, yet he left you.
You think you are smarter than him, yet he left you.
You have a big ass, yet he left you.
You neck and chinned his dick till your throat was sore and snot ran out yuh nose, yet he left you.
You think you have manners and self respect, yet he left you.
You have a good paying job, yet he left.
You have a degree, yet he left you.
You didn’t have sex with him for 90 days, yet he still left
He never talked about sex, then you fucked him, and he still left you.
You have a tight pussy, yet he left you.
You look better than all his other girlfriends, yet he left you.
and on and on and on…
Lightskin black women
 
ALL of you’s on this list were/are PLACEHOLDERS.
A placeholder is a woman good enough for “now” or even a few years,
some of you are even married placeholders believe it or not!
And the gag is that all of the you’s on this list knew something wasn’t right.
You felt that something was wrong, you knew it!
 
You can regulate your pussy all day long, and it doesn’t cause you are not the “one” to begin with..
You claim you have preference, but men know you are liberal with your convictions, he’s banking on it.
 
You know what gets every woman caught into the net of PLACEHOLDER???
 

****FLATTERY******

 
Appealing to your vanity.
That knocks you off your throne EVERY FUCKING TIME!
What did I tell you before?
Without vanity, and appealing to your need to be validated through it, men have NO POWER OVER YOU..
He bends time, and dodges a lot of incidentals through flattering you.
He makes you feel like you are actually in a commitment,
that he actually has genuine feelings for you all through administering FLATTERY!
Lord help us if you feel he is handsome or better than you because of money or status our whatever,
then you’ll start making concessions in your boundaries in order to impress him!
abstract portrait painting
Be immoveable.
Be unshakable.
Be unimpressible.
Be unbothered.
Be self contained.
And just observe him like he is observing you.
DO not assume that anything being said, any show of affection, gifts or money is some actually show of true feelings.
Take your time.
DO not give u your vagina.
BE fabulous, cordial, and unapologetic about your personal magic…
Be different.
Be unafraid to show flaws.
Honor the value you have for yourself at all time,
and do not negotiate your morals..
Now go back and RECLAIM YOUR THRONE!!back queens
IF you need to talk to be privately, find me HERE