Alone and Afraid?

Being yourself is going to hurt people.

Its going to dispassion people against you.

Why?

Because they will not be able to control you,

to manipulate you to do things that are not in line with your safety or life goals.

The only reason you have friends or lovers is because they like the way you make them feel.

But once you step away from he act of pleasing and choose to be passionate and purposeful

about the act of self fulfillment, people are going to take issue with you.

Watercolor Portrait Painting
“I AM a GIRL!” Original Watercolor Portrait Art by Salkis Re

They will stop calling you, stop inviting you, stop fucking you, stop buying gifts for you and so on…

And then the harsh reality of your aloneness will start to take form.

Do you know when the revelation of aloneness usually hits?

When you start to get old..

And you realize that all your sacrificing didn’t afford you their loyalty or undying concern.

then you become old and bitter because you have to face that you wasted so much time TRYING.

Trying to get LOVE.

Trying to get RESPECT.

 

What matters is your time and how much of ti you spend on frivolity or purpose.

And your purpose will need most of your energy because

you will have to fight the status quo of mediocrity and the fear that others try to infect you with…

You are your OWN GOD/ESS because your ACTIONS determine your road and your destination…

Be a god today…..

Carry On…

 

I am an Empath,

a Spiritual Advisor,

An Artist,

And a Mentor

Here to Help Your Path Back to Selfhood

black artists

If you are interested in gaining clarity of mind spiritual strength, please Click the link here for my books and coaching 

 

How to Heal Your Body With The Right Man!

Something that I’ve come to know in my own journey towards physical and

emotional healing is that your emotions are responsible for disease.

The emotional body holds the feelings in place whether it be

depression,

anger,

fear,

sorrow

and it assists in creating a stable environment for those emotions to thrive and grow.

African American Art
“Please Forgive Me” Original Art by Salkis Re

 

Once your emotions have a stable atmosphere to thrive, you start to feel off balance physically,

your immune system starts to weaken and dysfunction and illness sets in.

This is why the relationships you choose are SO FREAKIN IMPORTANT to your overall health and emotional well being.

Men whom you have sex with that do not love you will affect your health.

A Man that you are in long term toxic relationship with will affect your health.

 

Lingering Sorrow is not good for your soul, it’s not good for your heart,

it’s not good for your mind…..

Decide that you will put your health ABOVE your compassion for other peoples foolery.

Decide that you will sacrifice your convenience and

instant gratification for the long term goal of longevity and vitality.

Your insulin level must be low to loose weight and to keep your hormones regulated.

 

High insulin means higher cortisol levels which is the fat storing hormone.

Stress will keep you sick and fat. Stress from junk food and junk people will keep you fat and exhausted.

You will kick yourself into early menopause along with a host of other physical imbalances…

 

Cut The Excess: ALL OF IT!!

 

Do you need a push to bring emotional and physical balance to your life again?

I am here to help you!

You can Find Me HERE

 

 

 

“Label Makers, Label Breakers”

Written by Salkis Re

Self esteem challenges can happen in people who are attractive,

in people with higher IQs, in people with money, in people who are religious etc.
You’d be surprised at the type of people who really emotionally fragile out here.
Don’t let appearances fool you…

I remember a “Guy Friday” I had working for me at my salon back in the day.

He was dark skin an older man, but you could tell he was extremely handsome

in his youth because he still had six pack abs and pretty white teeth.
He come in a few times a week and clean my shop for a six pack of beer,

pork rinds and on Fridays, I threw in a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken just to see his face light up.

 

beautiful black women

He didn’t want much, he didn’t need much really because of his lifestyle.

But he wasn’t ashamed of his standard of living.

He was quick-witted, wisdom filled, and his sense of humor would shortened any difficult day I’d have.

I remember him inviting me to his home that he’d often call his “Palace”.

He was so proud that he had this home and he often told stories of his lovers tryna lay claim to it by leaving panties and toothbrushes behind..lol

So I went to see the palace, and it turned out to be an old, tiny,

Southern Georgia shack! He had a dirty couch on the patio with a rickety table next to it to prop his beer.

He called it his “seating area” lllllmao.
I asked, “You entertain your hoes here Millified?”
“Yes Boss Lady, haha ha ha”, he said with his raspy voice.

 

He opened the door and invited me inside. The floor boards screeched and some of them lifted when we took a step.

I was scared I was going to fall through the floor, so he took my hand and we zig-zagged through the living.

He chuckled looking at my “wtf” face. But he still wasn’t fazed by my frowning giggles.

The floor of the entire house was on an incline, you could have slid right into the kitchen if the floor was wet.

The walls were painted with dirt. A few water bugs came out to see who was in the house too.

He had plastic lawn cheers in front of a 52 inch TV. That TV was the focal piece of the house and would be the reason all the ladies didn’t want to leave his chateau, hahaha!

He said he had cable and he’d make some squash casserole and fried chicken if I ever wanted to come hang out on Sunday after church.

We went to his bedroom and he had a queen size mattress on the floor that looked like he pulled it out a land fill,

and the bedroom closet was almost as small as a medicine cabinet.
His bathroom couldn’t hold two people at the same time; you could literally shit, shower and shave all in one cause it was so damn tiny!

He said he was ready to whip up a batch of red Kool Aid if I was thirsty and motioned him not to bother.

When the tour was done, I looked at him in disbelief.

I wanted him to see how disgusted I was,

but he continued to look at me and laugh.

 

He was unfazed by my distain, and I showed my distain because I knew he didn’t give a shit what I thought.
He was proud of himself. He was proud of who he was. He had “pretty teeth” so to him he was a “pretty boy”..lllllmao

He was one of the few people I’ve met that was just unbothered by people’s opinions,

he stated what he was and that was all his heart and mind had room for.

The rest of us have so much more than him, but we disregard it for the perpetual fear that others may feel we are not good enough.

Abstract Portait Painting

Your self esteem is built on a weaker foundation than his one room shack!

All while you look good, you work a so-called “good job”.

You can save for vacation and occasionally splurge on nonessential things,

but you still are afraid of what people think of you.
You don’t take a chance, because your thoughts of failure plaque you without rest.

You have their degrees, their licenses and certificates but still feel invalid..

Your Perception of who you are has been “Given” to you.

That is why you are not empowered, and that is why you live so unsure of yourself in spite of all your accolades.

My Guy Friday stayed happy, even with what I classified as an impoverished lifestyle, he had a mentality of wealth.

Maybe that was the reason he remained so attractive and charismatic.

He could have been more I suppose had he taken advantage of the education system, maybe he would be more than hustler.

But that was my opinion of him, and one he didn’t share in…

He wasn’t intimidated by others who had more.

He talked to everybody, and free beer and free meals were the regular thank you gifts he received for his humor and charismatic optimism.

So what will you do?

Continue to live in fear of not being good enough,

not living good enough,

not being attractive enough,

not having enough money to be enough?

When will you arrest those hypothesizing thoughts of imaginary restraints?

When you say fuck it, this is what I am and I’m fabulous as is???
You can do it right now.

You don’t need to kneel before a Queen,

or get a certificate in the mail,

or have an engagement ring on your finger to claim your right to feel fantastic about yourself today!!

Make the shift.
Make the decision..
And be what YOU say you are…

“Medicine Woman”
~Salkis Re

 

IF YOU NEED TO TALK: CLICK HERE

Fight Elegantly!

Decisions based solely on emotion NEVER stick.

You may be able to garner their pity and remorse for a little while,

but eventually that person goes back to his/her old ways after their emotions have settled back down,

This is why men feel sorry about about cheating when they get caught, and after the dust settles,

they are back out there at it again.

Black women are getting pimped out of their vaginas by everybody,

black men, white men, even other women

people generally do not change unless they experience some

tremendously emotional event that breaks the patterns within their nervous system.

Thick Locs

 

For the most part, we are all fixed as adults. Fixed in what we believe about ourselves,

how we perceive love, how we quantify our value.

Relationships are about the decision to share a life with someone as they are,

and with your love and encouragement,

you can “Influence” them to become “Improved” partners IFFFFFFFFFFF that is what HE desires to be…..

 

black love

Black women are emotionally exploited by everybody because our pathologies are well known and easy to recognize

while others enjoy living with the ambiguity of their depression and low self esteem whiling concealing

pharmaceutical remedies for their suicidal thoughts properly fitted garments, scantily clad pics or perfectly

coiffed hair that serve to disguise their emotional dysfunction.

 

abstract art

Our pathology includes the admiration and support of anybody who do not resemble ourselves,

and the admiration and support of people who mock, mimic and make fun of us.

We are enemies of each other perception based on “collective” biases that are based on propaganda and indoctrination.

 

Redeem yourself. Pull yourself up from the muck and Myer….

Divorce yourself from anything or anyone who’s opinions are self serving and decide that a

feeling is not a truth unless you start living in agreement with it,

and that goes for yourself or anyone else…

 

If you need to talk with me privately, find me HERE

 

Stop Playing Small!

Some of us are wasting away at life.
The Great Pretenders I call them.
You are Afraid to make a mistake, and afraid to get your heart broken again.
So you wallow in denial of what you want

AND deny your responsibility in the results you’ve gotten so far.
Everything you could have been will die with you; that is the life you are living right now…

 

 

 

Goddess art

I refuse to conform.

To cower down into obscurity.

I wasn’t born to live an uneventful life, and neither are you!

I wasn’t born for people to have something to shame and ridicule for my nappy hair and big lips, and neither are you!

I want born for people to tell me I’m not smart enough for what I want to have, and neither are you!

And YOU weren’t born to live in quiet desperation, to play it safe to avoid pain.

Your trauma is your SCHOOL, and you are conditioned to lead because you survived it.
But you sit back and do nothing with all that experience you have.

You prefer to wallow and feel sorry for yourself like you earn money to be upset.

 

 

Abstract portrait painting
Art by Salkis RE

 

What does it benefit you to live in fear today?
How will your life be better out of your decision not to take a chance?
People need to know that they can do it, and you might be the only example of this,

but you’ve designed life that ensure that they will NEVER meet you.

A disservice is what you create in 360 degree form when you make decisions based on fear.
Its time to GET UP.

If you Need me to assist you, I am HERE

 

 

 

 

Men Want Women To Like Them!

Men are curious creatures ready to play.

The problem is that they have no conscious about “playing” with YOUR life and your emotions.

Given the opportunity they will test you, and the testing assists them in finding a way into your heart.

That’s all courtship is really.

Courtship is the process of making you feel good while he takes you through behavioral modification.

Beautiful Black women with thick locs
Artist/Life Coach ~Salkis Re

 

 

 

His job is to alter your perception, to make you feel something for him,

to move away from your normal programming so you will want to fit him into your life..

So what’s the true tea here?

DECEPTION and COURTSHIP go hand in hand.

But it’s a beautiful thing. Courtship is seduction and seduction feels really good

because it allows us the opportunity to escape reality through his pleasantries..

Except it.

Expect it.

 

Because you’re doing also, you are doing it so he can fall in love, and he’s doing it so he can fuck you into loving him!

And the gag is that men will lay the burden of truth on you.

They will say that “you should’ve know better” or “you should’ve chosen better”

which is an admission that you shouldn’t choose with your heart but with your heart.

But the quagmire here is that they don’t feel that you value them UNTIL you display an emotional investment in them.

 

So what should you do?

Should you maintain your reasonableness and risk being viewed as a contemptuous,

heartless-bitch, or do you strive for creating a “real” emotional bond,

throw caution to the wind, and give him what he desires most?

I’d say that your lane oscillates between the two.

You want to show that you are interested, but not gullible.

You want be kind, but not compromising.

You want to be optimistic, yet sensible and observant.

You cannot be just one or the other because on one end you’ll look like a desperate fool,

and other you’ll look like a desperate bitch!

Thick Locs
iLoveHerArt.com

Most men will talk your panties down are pimps.

And pimps are: smooth talking ramblers who speak in ELOQUENT INSINCERITY.

Know this, what he wants to do, what he would like to do,
what he wishes he could do,
what he’s “going” to do
and what he’s thinking about doing have NOTHING to do with you!!
Making decisions about the direction of your life based on the “hypothetical” indecisions of men will be round about the time you make your biggest misjudgment.

 

All these do is serve to create a “feeling” that “something”

is about to be done so you can gamble on your faith that it will.

So the order of the day is to take optimal care of yourself FIRST!

This means that you trust your instincts;

you move only when you are comfortable;

you keep your purpose and your mission in the forefront of your mind

ALWAYS! And know that what he offers you has to be in line with your purpose PERIOD!

 

If you need to talk, I’m HERE

“T.I Cheated on Tiny AGAIN????

“T.I Cheated on Tiny AGAIN???

So the gag is that Tiny, T.I’s wife is a fool for staying with Tip because once again he is caught cheating.
Some of y’all say she has no self esteem because she keeps forgiving him for his infidelity.

That could very well be the case, but let me say something about commitment: it is a sacrifice!!!
She took him in at the height of her career with escape, he was TI back then, he wasn’t anything, but she backed him.

She gave him the best years of her life and 5 children. She gave him passes, and threesomes too. She got surgery to keep her tits and ass tight and high, she took the charge when they got caught with cocaine in they car, she stayed chase while he was doing his bid in jail.

Black love

And guess what? HE STILL CHEATED over and over and over again.

So what SHOULD that tell you ladies. What should be included in all those seminars, You tube vids, vegan potlucks, yoni egg user brigades and the like, need to just say what is inevitable, what is highly probable, what is almost a guarantee if your make has a half way working penis and/or a little bit of money. And that is that men CHEAT.

You are killing yourself trying to hold it together for HIM, when all he wants is simply someone NEW. Your loyalty doesn’t mean shit, how much of the rent you can pay or even if you’re paying ALL of the rent, it doesn’t mean shit, you can think you’re hot or maybe you actually are hot, and guess what?
It doesn’t matter!!!

So Tiny should walk away from time and money SHE put into him so he can be free and clear to dick hop? She can move out the house and get a condo across town with a nice looking Guy Friday who comes to check her “plumbing”, but divorce?
Divorce him to do what? Date again?
To find another fool that just wants to say he fucked T.I’s ex wife?
NO! She should ride it out. Ride that shit into the sunset and find joy however she can because at this stage the odds that she can pull another T.I is slim.

She got time and the stamina to build up another man at this stage of her life?
And at is the point of all of that when all roads still lead to what she is facing now..

She need to do what Snoop Dog wife did: visit down and let him figure it out while the bag keeps coming in

Tiny, monitor your bag. The rest is irrelevant… Period…
Take the Black Pill!!

“Life Coach”
~Salkis Re

“How Do You Get a Man to Love You? “

 

Beautiful Black Women
Life CoachArtist ~Salkis Re

Well there are a few hard truths to swallow before you can position yourself for that possibility.
Some things that you will have to do are:
🌼1)Bite your tongue.
🌼2)Swallow your pride.
🌼3) Be charming.
🌼4)Play dumb.
🌼5)Act helpless.
🌼6) Stay away from intoxicants.
🌼7) Have excellent hygiene.
🌼8) Dress to compliment your form,
🌼9)Workout.
🌼10) Eat right.
🌼11) Pray.
🌼12) Do not upstage him with your intellect.
🌼13) Do not act like you can’t live without sex.
🌼14) Do not have sex too frequently because your “novelty” will wear off faster than is beneficial to you.
🌼15) Act like you are accustomed to nice things.
🌼16) Make sure you are more good looking than he is, preferably 3-5 points higher in the scale.
🌼17) Resist being argumentative because this is a sign that you care. And you shouldn’t.
🌼18) Do not check up on him or grill him about whereabouts.
🌼19) Do not consider procreation with him until you have been Married for a while because being a mother is a “little death” towards your “sexual attractiveness”..

🌼🌼20) This one’s most important. Allow a man to “pick” you. Do not fall for the sexual liberation trap that makes you think you can discern interest in a man that YOU desire, you’ll end up giving him pussy he didn’t need to perform to get.

Motivational Quotes
Aritist/ Life Coach
~Salkis Re

Do NOT pursue a man you have to convince will like your “type” i.e.(fat, dark, shorthair, skinny),

That, “You don’t know what your missing” sales pitch: piss on it and let it burn cause you are setting yourself up for “pick me” abuse.

Final words, by no means is this a comprehensive list, it is merely a foundation to build on to the other things that must be done that require mentalism and self control.

Love Doesn’t exist in romantic relationships, this is why you HAVE to do all the steps I listed to coax those feelings out of him.

When you accept that love is a game, and an unfair one at that, then you will move your mind out of the conflict of right and wrong with what you MUST do to position yourself as a woman of value.

AND………
Get over your tug of war.
Get over this happily ever after that you are ashamed you don’t have yet.
Respect the wisdom your experience has bestowed upon you.
Stop thinking that the TRUTH is sad..
Take the “BLACK PILL”
And gain control of your emotions.

Amen, Amun, Ameen
“The Black Hat Society”
~Salkis Re

Witches
Salkis Re, Artist/ Author/Poet/Life Coach

Love Who Loves You!

Native American Art
Artist, Life Coach ~Salkis Re

 

When we women realize that love is the manipulated emotion a human being with ever have??

I am talking about romantic love…

There is nothing NATURAL about it.

Two people come together hiding what they are ashamed of, making promises/DEALS for what they intend to give each other IF one or the other subscribes to the SALES PITCH…

Then after some time together, each person oozes out their darker side, their unreasonable side, the side that was being held back right until the perfect time to reveal the venom and the devilish tendencies to the other person…

 

Then after a few emotional events, many some good sex and a lot of time together, they decide to pair bond and cuff each other down for the duration…

That is what love amounts too..

But it is STILL an awesome deal, relationships that is…

It is still one of the most satisfying things a woman can do!

Children come from that deal, and if two people can find common ground,

they actually can make each other BETTER souls on this earth…

Its just not a fairytale is all…

Its work, struggle,  and a great deal of disappointment,

but its better than going through life alone and unchallenged.

My opinion…

 

“PUT ON YOUR BLACK HAT”
Life Coach| Artist| Author| Poet
~Salkis Re
Art by Salkis Re

Beautiful African American Women
Life Coach, Salkis Re

So if any of this resonates with you, and you want MORE wisdom personalized to help you fight your insecurities and mediocre relationships, I am your girl.

Why me? Cause I’ve been the underdog for most of my life.

While a painful position it has been, it was also a gift, because people rarely were pretentious around me. People are only compelled to pretentiousness if they feel the need to “Impress” you.

They didn’t with me,  BUT this gave me the opportunity to see into people’s souls, to see the true nature of men AND women..

Don’t come to me if you want to feel good. I don’t do any of that. You come to me to solve your problems and most of the time it will not be pleasant, but it will FREE YOU!

Click HERE

 

 

YOU ARE UGLY!!

You ARE UGLY!!

So I did a video on my You Tube channel called:
“You Are Not Pretty Enough To Get The Man You Want?”
Now I addressed some sensitive things in that video about attractiveness and how it plays a major role in the quality level of the men we get.

The FACTS: All women are not beautiful. It sounds good, it Makes some us feel good when other women say it. But they are lying to those of us who know that we are not able average in looks, maybe even below average in looks.

I have stated many MANY times that I consider myself to be VERY average, some days less than that. So I make sure I eat right and do the things to maintain my wellbeing so that no deficits are exaggerated.

Women who are not conventional beauties must the need for validation in terms of beauty. It is often a lie, the flattery I mean. And it is used to ‘soften” your defenses: its purpose is to create emotional dependency and allows your body to be used as a tool for pleasure and recreation.

 

abstract artSo here is the deal actually, I advise ALL WOMEN, no matter how beautiful they are, to remove the NEED for validation of your vanity. Make you beauty or lack there of, inconsequential so that you are released from the anguish of acceptance by men or doing things to win their approval that perpetuates vulnerability and low self esteem…

When you take Vanity out of the equation, you remain RIGHT MINDED, not easily persuaded to conform to the will of men, and YOU get to remain in authority of YOUR perception of your worth whether pretty or ugly….

Do you know how autonomous it feels to eviscerate the “WORRY” that comes from he obsession with vanity?? Men have absolutely no emotional power over you when you take away the his power to validate your looks…

So nature has dealt you some cards, and you have to play these cards throughout your life. Take the vanity card OFF the table and get your AUTONOMY back…
Simple as That…

“Medicine Woman”
~ Salkis Re

So Who Am I?

African American art
“Artist/Life Coach”
~Salkis Re

Well, Im a black woman.

A black woman who low self worth, low self esteem and self doubt for much of my life. I never felt like I belonged anywhere, well at least anywhere I wanted to be. So I adopted an aggressive, over sensitive attitude to protect myself from being hurt by people. I tried to do things to face like skin bleaching and severe weight loss diets in hopes of transforming myself into a gorgeous woman entitled to respect and love.

I did so many things under the guise of self improvement and ended up damaging by physical body while creating more to hate about myself.

I’ve learned a lot along the way to self efficacy.  And it didn’t come from new make up techniques or having longer hair.

It really came from facing my demons and all the repetitive dialog I had in my head about my self worth.

In my awakening, a heightened level of creativity emerged.black artists

A new level of femininity and my own brand of sensuality came to the surface too.

I want to show you how to accept who you are, TOTALLY and open the flood gates to your own authentic, wild, unconventional representation of your best self. FLAWS AND ALL.

If that sounds like something that you want, please give me a shout by email: salkis@iloveherart.com

Or if you are ready to take the chance and take a plunge, book a session HERE