“Virtuous Women Get No Love”

 

Beautiful Black Women
Life Coach\Artist ~Salkis Re

 

There are many women that have morals and values,

who are ready and willing to be the subordinate for a strong man,

but often times, she does not come packaged in vanity.

The virtuous woman often times will come in a thrifty, plain looking package,

not the TROPHY woman men are often in pursuit of.

But she will cook for you,

have sex when and how you want it, take care of your children and do as you say.

BUT YOU WILL OVERLOOK HER***

You men do not want THAT woman. You say you do, but you don’t.

You want that women who does NOT want you, it’s called the “hunt” isn’t it?

So you men look for women who are better looking than you,

and those women are looking for men who are better than them.

And you spin around in your hamster wheel asking why did she do this,

or how could she do that.
Why?

Because she NEVER wanted you in the first place, that’s why.
So it’s wrong from the start,

but the nature of man is to care more about what they do NOT have over what they DO have…

“The Black Hat Society”
Life Coach/Artist/Medicine Woman
Salkis Re

They Said You’re Ugly, And They Are Right!!!!

They Are Right About how you look!

When you are told over and over again that you are unattractive,
I want you to consider that “they”
might have just cause for saying it.
 
Now before you berate me or try simulate
“outrage” to go along with your other displaced emotions,
I would like for you to simply consider
what you are “projecting”, moreso than what you “look” like.

Approval Addiction Makes You Unattractive!

Your beauty, or “lack there of”, comes from
the showcasing of your anxiety and need for approval.
AND when you, BLACK girl, “conform” in any way,
you WILL display an improper fit and show
the world that you own no identity outside
of what you’ve been given.

You Wear your Insecurities On Your Sleeve

African American Art
                   Black Girl Magic by Salkis Re
 
And you sojourn while thinking you are
making progress, but you are stuck.
But you stay committed to the clownish makeup
while wearing clothes that will not compliment your form
with hairstyles that resemble assembly line wigs
at the China Man’s beauty supply store.
All of this will affect you swift “invisibility” to men.

Conformity KILLS Beauty

And the irony is that in your attempt to be
what Society considers beautiful, you become MORE unattractive,
BECAUSE you’ve positioned yourself
as a substandard DUPLICATE of what you CANNOT be,
a walking, talking, mannequin that represents
a type of woman whom you’ve decided is “better” that yourself.
 
And you think these facts can be “hidden” around glamor.
You can only suppress yourself emotions for so long: they will eventually burst forth to tell the truth of all you hide.
 

Beauty is NOT anxiety driven, it’s Peace based.

It is the personalization of what you were born
to represent in an unapologetically creative way.
 
And that peace within you will start to relax your furrowed lines on your face.
And that peace will cause your skin to glow.
And that peace will make your voice sound soothing to hear.
And that peace gives room for your individuality to be expressed.
And that peace makes grace hover over you.
And that peace makes you a moving meditation.
And that peace makes you enjoy caring for yourself.
And that peace will attraction men to you.
And on and on and on again… ~Salkis Re
 

So Who Am I?

“Artist/ Life Coach”
~Salkis Re
Art by Salkis Re
Get My Artwork and Coaching Services here: www.iloveherart.com

To Be Desired or to Be Loved?

African Art Eyes
“Black Girl” Art by Salkis Re

Do you want to be loved or desired?

That was a question I asked myself one day when I realized the distinction between the two.

Love, as I see it, is this relaxed thing.

It is comfort, reliable, easy going place you get to when you’ve been with someone for a while.

Sex is more like “Peeing”

Sex is more like “Peeing” as fucking becomes an act of “released/relief” of tension, frustration, boredom and stress.

Sometimes, if he wants you really badly, he’ll eat your pussy without you asking for it first, hell even eat it till you cum if he’s really horny.

That’s what “love” sex becomes, a sort miss and hit

That’s what “love” sex becomes, a sort miss and hit with more misses than hits.
Then there’s desire. Smiling…

The one in which emotions like anxiety,

excitement,

thirst,

yearning,

 with Courting and unsteady emotions in play.

You feel a little pain when he has to leave,

your hips unhinge from their sockets to make more room for his dik, you want to swallow him, and he you..

That desire that interrupts your work as you start to tingle and secrete with just the thought of him inside you,

and he gets hard just watching you get dressed.

African Art
Art Process by Salkis Re

Men who “love” make promises they can’t keep

Men who “love” make promises they can’t keep because they are past the point of the intensity that initiated the vow in the first place.

Love is a road where you will meet disappointment, betrayal, boredom and regret.

Being Desired or desiring someone is a road where you are emotionally satisfied,

so satisfied that you don’t feel the sting of the betrayal,

and you recover quickly from disappointment,

you feel minimal boredom, and good experiences overshadow regrets…

So yes, you get those things you don’t want in both Love and Desire but “how” you feel them lends to entirely different experiences.

And there it is.. I had to choose one, it most definitely would be to be DESIRED.
“Artist/Life Coach”
~Salkis Re

black artists

So who am I?

An Artist.

A Life Coach

A Friend.

A Mother.

A Black Woman who has sojourned her entire to find peace,

self love, and the expression of a purposeful life.

I have taken on the task of HEALER using my creative/art skill and communicative means.

I hope you share this message with all you know.

I hope you reach out to if you need guidance and instruction. Let’s make 2018 truly the best year ever!
“Artist/ Life Coach”
~Salkis Re

**The painting featured in this post can be found here: my other website www.iloveherart.com

 

P.S. Be sure to share and subscribe to this blog. You will find the link in the top right corner of this site homepage..

Love Ya!

You MAD FOR WHAT???

 

 

We always hear it. Control your emotions, or showing one’s (especially women) emotions is a sign of weakness.
No!
A sign of weakness is in being undisciplined..
Showing your emotions to a degree that is appropriate to the situation is a sign of intelligence, not weakness.

Road rage makes no sense, that’s emotional.

Throwing away your food cause it got cold, that’s emotional.

 

Black Art Eyes
                                                       African Art by Salkis Re

 

Wanting to kill someone because they don’t want you anymore, that’s EMOTIONAL!!

A disciplined mind will reheat the food if its cold, listen to an audio book while in traffic,

or help pack the bags of a lover who earnestly expresses to leave.

Anguish, the kind that takes lives or destroys property is hardly ever the appropriate display of emotions.

 

The Hermetic Maxim states

The Hermetic Maxim states that to truly rise upon any state of emotion, you should practice standing in the middle, meaning remaining neutral.

What does remaining neutral mean?
It’s sort of a gentler way of not giving fuck!
It is you remaining grounded through a storm, a sun shower, or sunshine.

You simply apply a “that’s ok” to things that go extremely well or extremely bad.
Harder to do of course, but this is the A-B-C’s and 1-2-3’s of EMOTIONAL CONTROL.
Now, how does this translate into a woman’s life?

How do we ( as we are known to be the more emotional of the sexes) learn to adopt emotional control when we are designed to express it?

Appropriation  . …..

Allocating our emotions to match the level of a given situation.

This Happened Last Week

I was at a department store shopping for a New Year’s Eve dress and couldn’t help but hear a woman gossiping on the phone about someone she knew.

From what I could make out from mumbles mixed with shouts,

she was upset about a friend making a decision to  f&*k a man she warned her friend not too.

Her cussing showed a heightened level of concern/ beratement towards her “friend”.

Black Art Eyes
African Art by Salkis RE for iLoveHerArt.com

She called her an F’ing Fool,

and Stupid Ass for not heeding her advice.

I saw spit bubbles building inside the corners of her mouth, and the dialogue was clearly dehydrating her.

And that conversation went back and forth for so long that my 11 year old started looking at her like she was crazy!!

I watched her hands flailing in the air as her eyes got wider to emphasize her point.

Could her heart rate be elevated at this point as well?

More than likely…

All worked up for what? Gossip?

All worked up for what? Gossip?
Fake concern?
Because she’s such a good friend?
Or was she revelling in her friends pain while under the guise of concern?

The point is that there was no point in getting herself upset over it. Her upsetness turned into a gossip fest and platform to trash her “friend”.

So the question YOU SHOULD ALWAYS ASK IS : What’s the Point?

Why get worked up over anything you have no control over or cannot change.

Our problem is that we spend too much time worrying over NOTHING.

We ACT concerned and blow things out of proportion as a diversion from our own troubles.
And quite frankly, I know and admittedly have experienced false satisfaction displaying emotional authority by ,ironically, defaming and alienating people you claim to love.

This was something I had to work on myself because I made a habit out finding the flaws in people and exploiting them..

So to conclude this post, I invite you to practice quietly posing the “What’s the Point” question in front of what you are about to say or do,

and if you can’t find a

legitimate reason to engage,

respond,

get worked up,

then simply let it go

because the appropriate emotion for it, obviously, is to have none for it…

Forward Motion!
Xoxo,
Salkis Re

 

black artists

 

So who am I?
An Artist.

A Life Coach

A Friend.

A Mother.

A Black Woman who has sojourned her entire to find peace,

self love, and the expression of a purposeful life.

I have taken on the task of HEALER using my creative/art skill and communicative means.

I hope you share this message with all you know.

I hope you reach out to if you need guidance and instruction. Let’s make 2018 truly the best year ever!
“Artist/ Life Coach”
~Salkis Re

How a Woman Should Love a Man

“Understanding How to Love”
Written by Salkis Re

Appreciation rushes into your heart only when you’re about to lose what you’ve taken for granted. And Love works the same way; you don’t love until your life is disrupted by the anguish for losing someone. Familiarity breeds contempt and disregard for that person. But if they leave, if they display any indifference towards you, it levels the playing field and the upper hand you enjoyed crumbles like a house of cards.

Big eyes in art
Sketch by Salkis Re

You start questioning your value as it seems your kingdom was mirage of sorts, a figment of your ego instead of reality. Love is like that.
🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹 🌹
A give and take, which is a “loss” and “gain”, both intentionally or unexpected. You as a woman are a nurturing soul, designed to observe, create, absolver, build and repair the environment around you. You are designed to lead while being shielded, that may be from the back, or from the side, but never in harms way. Your obligation is to position yourself so that you are always protected.
🌺 🌺 🌺 🌺 🌺 🌺 🌺 🌺 🌺 🌺 🌺 🌺 🌺 🌺

Art in progress by Salkis Re

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Your cunning is your “natural defense”. All the things that you are to be: sensitive, respectful, loving, supportive should only come out in its fullest capacity AFTER the receiver is “tried and proven” worthy of it, and even then, you know what it does, so you give and take away in accordance with what’s needed to maintain an environment that keeps you intrigued and delighted.
🌻 🌻 🌻 🌻 🌻 🌻 🌻 🌻 🌻 🌻 🌻 🌻 🌻 🌻
“Mistress of Words”

African American Art
“Spiritual Advisor” ~Salkis Re

“Black Hat Society”

“Spiritual Advisor”

“Creative Soul”

~Salkis Re

 

 

 

Website: www.iloveherart.com
#artist #artinprogress #bigeyes #lifecoach #africanart #beautifulblackwomen #relationshipadvice #drawing #artsketch

“The ‘Act” of Unconditional Love”

                                                                      “Secrets Under My Skirt” Poem by Salkis Re

Most of us women have been “trained” to “act” in ways that will be appealing to men. To talk softly and smile, be agreeable and non threatening. No up-staging or acting like we know it all, I’d even go so far as to play dumb in order to be a good subordinate. You can’t overrule the king, and you certainly better not if you are closer to average looking or you’ll blow straight into oblivion the entire “mirage” of your “packaged” beauty.

Trained and ready to serve is the initiation into womanhood for most of us. Everybody worrying about gray hair and keep the body together so his “love” never ceases. And some of you still have the audacity to utter ideals of unconditional love when you’ve been conditioned your entire life for that love..

Great romances abound. I see intense kisses and braggadocios parading using “planned” photo ops of blissful folly to make the ether audience entertained and slightly jealous too. You’ve felt inadequate since the first cartoon you watched and that first comb you put to your barbie doll’s head. Everywhere you turn, there is a “problem” or a “flaw about you that needs tending too. EVERYWHERE!! And that inadequacy drowns the heart worry and fear. You compete with women who don’t even know you, you try up outclass and eclipse the women who threaten your livelihood/man.

Lol what is the tea? Men love sex more than they love women. And your hole holds more value than you whole. As a matter of fact, the rest of your body, your needs just get in the way as that hole is used like a toilet bowl for his frustration and stress. But that’s another post. I don’t want you to think I’m brooding here, and I certainly am not recruiting for any hidden: let’s all hate men propaganda. Men are yummy, and admirable, some god-like even.

Most of the people I look up to are indeed men. When they are worthy of course..

So no, I want you to have love by whatever it represents to you.  I don’t focus on the hope part because I know we have the scornful parts of ourselves to even get to a place where we can see what deserves the time to cultivate love. The parts you hide, are the parts you have to see so you can release your shame, doubt and fear of not being good enough for the very love you want..

Who’s zooming who? Like a Lady Aretha Franklin says..

I’m being bit facetious now, but the point must be made.

The tea is medicinal, tastes bitter, yet always needed.

“Your Life Coach ” ~ Salkis Re

Distraction Dingalings Are Expensive!

You must test man for mental and physical strength. You are too quick to allow entry into your mind far less your body. And it’s so easy to weed out the weak

minded. They are easily distracted, have no goals, very undisciplined, and emotionally fragile.

Self Portrait by artist Tim Baxter

 

He wants what they are to stingy to pay for.

He expects something for nothing and usually at your expense.

But your longing to quench your on thirst makes you a beggar of your own desires. You will become a new victim for a different face because you

never learn your lesson. The needle spins around the record of your life, skipping over the scratch again and again.

You admire the beauty of other women, and you want the power you think their beauty affords them. And you soak in their hollow doctrines and their enchantments and things, only to find out that you are right back where you started: starving for attention.

And the truth is that I’m not telling you anything that your heart does not already know. You just feel that the truth will bring you further away from companionship and love. But you are sleeping with men who do not love you, who don’t have the aptitude to provide or protect you, who will abandon you crisis hits.

Though a penis inserts itself into your vagina regularly, you are alone, even more alone than if you were by yourself.

So my question to you is when will you get out of the fog and face the truths? Distractions cost a lot of time and money you know, any they are never worth what you have to expel to maintain them. They devour you eventually.

But there is a light at the end of all these tunnel rats you’ve been trying to leap over. It will take a brain washing of sorts. It will mean that you have to challenge notions of sexuality, femininity, self worth, pleasure etc.. Smiling, what it means is that you will have to upgrade your thinking and the basic need to “just be heard”, and you will have to move into solution based thinking instead of get ‘coping’ with your problems.

Awww, you want to be a Goddess and you think its all fun right? No. It is not.

How many can sit at a throne seat?

That’s right! ONLY ONE! So be prepared for that, the alone time I mean.

That’s one of the biggest hurdles, being alone I mean. We want the sisterhood to hold us up, to give shoulders that we can soak with our tears. And it feels good for a moment. What you want is more than a moment, you want a lifetime fix!

black women with locs
                                                                                                Art Sale!! Artist: Salkis Re

You need help? Well I right here…
“Your Life Coach ” ~ Salkis Re

This is article help you? If it did, let’s add on more value to your transformation. I’m having an exclusive  Art Sale for my fans and subscribers, and I want you to get something symbolic of your own transformation, and the pivot point I hope you’ve reached as of this reading. Get one of these magical paintings as a reminder of your commitment to excellence and a grand life! Click Here to catch the Sale before it ends tonight: Salkis Art

 

 

 

 

 

 

FIND ME OVER THERE TOO! 🙂

 

 

The Pied Piper and Your Willing Sacrifice!

Your love for the lies…

You have a love affair with presentation, with the sweet nothings whispered in your ear. You meet girlfriends for drinks and ask them to speculate on the true intent of the man you love.
You worry. You worry because you know the answer already, you just want hope that its other than what you suspect. But the pied piper leads you to doom, not with bravado or hurtful rants. He leads you there by becoming the source of everything you’ve ever wanted.He listens to your woes with great interest and attention. He maps your weaknesses while offering delightful experiences to “restore” your excitement to dream and your faith in the unknown.

The Secret About All Magic

Yet, as with all good magicians and seducers, he “asks” for your permission to enter your mind. Spells and Your Binding Agreement
See, spells do not work if you are resistant. You must be a willing participant for beguilement. You must be “open” to suggestion and this is why are find yourself all in love with him before he reveals his intent and the truth of his heart. No darling, you are very very much in control: you give up your control because you think his offer is more splendid than anything you already posses. You will learn more about real magic and how it operates in your life as we work together. But for now, understand that is the only way that manipulation can work is  you have to first believe that you have a problem and secondly, that HE possess the power to solve it!

Once that is established, then you are locked in.

I told you before, Dracula must be invited in, even the Devil had to has God permission to tempt you!! What does this mean for you personally though? Well it means that you are playing a victim of the very decisions you make. you have allowed your emotions to dictate policy and your mode of operations. And this is why your math never adds up, this is why you can’t quantify the value this person brings to your life. You can’t think straight because you are not using that part of your mind t think, you are using your emotions to think Big mistake!.
The warning signs come though.

You are NEVER let without Gods guidance.

You just choose to override the nudge, that off feeling, or that gnawing in your stomach because its unscientific. But what could be more unscientific than hypothetical plans for a future you may not be the one he chooses to have one with?

First Decree: Tell The Truth To Yourself At All Times..
Salkis Re “Your Life Coach”

There is so much more to share with you if you allow me to coach you through becoming your best self, full of power! Click Here to book your session with me.

African American art

Be A Quiet Hoe!

I don’t think there is anything worse than wanting someone in your life that doesn’t want to be with you. I have been on the receiving end of this more times than I care to admit. I have also been the progenitor of emotional devastation in men I no longer wanted to be with. It’s not easy letting people go, but what’s worse than that moment you break someone’s heart,is the loss of time. Time is that shit you can’t get back. You can get another lover but you can’t recover the time you wasted trying to make things work with someone you know you no longer want to be with.

Break ups can get tricky when the sex is good, when children are born into it, or when financial investments are tied into it. But time is more valuable than anything you could lose because it is not a renewable resource.  When you are not sure, you’re not sure. But when you know, when you have already tallied up the cost of separation, talked to the lawyers secretly, took vacations to see another lover, well you know that you know.

A piece of mind is priceless. Being free to start over is scary but exciting at the same time when you are perfectly clear on your objectives. We are not jumping from the frying pan into the fire here. You need to stay your ass put if that is the case. I have seen breakups happen and the chic just goes on dick binge: in one fell swoop, her virtue and reputation ends up in the toilet cause she couldn’t handle the responsibility of her new freedom. Freedom does not negate consequence. You can’t escape consequence just because no one can stop you from making a decision.

Results will happen, and you need to know what you are striving for. But if you must be a hoe, just don’t be a noisy one. Work your “hoedom” quietly and stop leaving verifiable evidence all over the place for people to point fingers at you. Tell your mama if you must and maybe one tried and proven friend, but no bull horns unless your getting tell all book deal like Super Head. Just do you best to reason out your decisions because adding “causal pu$$y giving” regret to a roster  already filled with years of unfulfilling obligation, just invites more confusion and turmoil to your mind and heart.

african american art

I Can Love You Better!

Making things better in a relationship.. Hmm I don’t think a turn around in a down hill spiral takes a tremendous amount of time. If you are with someone who treats you unkind, its not because they are sitting there waiting on the ‘right time” to treat you right. They treat you dastardly because they want to, because they have no inspiration or incentive to treat you any other way. But one hand cannot clap my lovelies: it’s a master and slave relationship. He can’t rule without subjects that have agreed to his appointed sovereignty.

The instinct to hold you dear is a gumbo mix of give and take IT away. Its an atmosphere of anxiety and incomplete comfort that causes one to strive to make pleasing you their number one purpose. Equality doesn’t feed passion. Truthfulness doesn’t make one treat you fair.. But of course you know this as you have had much lonely nights to asses and account for all your uprightness and your willingness to show, (even at the risk of  chasing reciprocity), how much you genuinely care.

You have given him no room to earn you! You are impatient and needy, yet so motivated to learn the lesson for the 100th time that beggars can’t be choosers. What is the secret I must share? You do not give to get, you BE to get. This is what Queens do!

We all appreciate and cherish what we have earned. We shine them up like trophies on  beautiful display cases, but with things given without merit, we put them in the back of our closet, or box them in the attic to collect dust until we fine someone who can find more use for them than we can fairly give.

Please visit my online art store www.iloveherart.com and don’t forget to subscribe to my blog. Go on hit it now, and get some tea and come back and read a little more 🙂

~Salkis Re

 

 

African Art

Ooooh She’s Naked!!!!

Soo I am revamping, cleaning house, looking our my business plans, my goals and motivations.  What is my message? What has been my message this entire time?

Empowerment of course. Female Empowerment to be precise. And healing..

I wanted and still do intend on portray life’s lessons through the eyes of the sweet little girls I paint. But questions were posed to me the other day, and it became apparent to me that I was editing myself as an artist so that I would not offend people. I dabbled here and there in sensuality and sexuality, but I realized that some of the story was being left untold. If I am truly for the autonomy of women, this means being comfortable with everything that being a woman is about.

Some people are offended by nudes and I respect that. But what I don’t have to do is make my work a reflection of what they are uncomfortable with. So I ask them now, are you offended when you take off your clothes? Maybe that is where the angst comes from. A disgust with one’s self possibly? I know that one very well too. So I face myself in the mirror while making corrections instead hiding behind morality like so many of my beloved sisters do. Anyone who has followed my work or commentary for any length of time knows that I’m not an advocate for parting your legs whenever the munchies hit you. Discipline is what I propose for all vices and corrections in character flaws not over indulgences.

Got a new website coming called “iloveherart.com”

Nudity in my work represents total relaxation with the self, nothing to hide and no need to hide. This is what I’m on a mission to embody as I shed old skin and look for new experiences to aid in the formation of my new personality. Self respect is about doing in the dark the same things you do in the light. Its about packing up the need to pretend that you ‘don’t this’ for anyone. Are we holding up billboards? No. Every man doesn’t need to know what I do in bed, but the man that I want to be with should be told without hesitation what my needs are. But  what I find is that people that hide what they fear also inadvertently hide and are unable to communicate what they really want too. Guilt has no place in healing. No place in my world. I will leave that charge to those of you who enjoy the dance of deception, so I will not carry your burden for you. One of the main reasons that I became an artist is for the freedom to do whatever I wanted to do and find those who resonate with my form of expression.

That’s it!

I hope my fans continue to walk with me as I evolve and explore the vastness of love as I see it. Some of you will drop off, and I don’t mind if you do. I just ask that you do classy and quietly like you expect me to be….

Enjoyed my tasteful rant? Subscribe to my blog and share with friends. BE sure to check out sweetness on canvas at my Etsy Store too!

 

african art by Salkis Re

Your Only As Sick As Your Secrets

 

I love my paid hoes and poor sluts…

I have a few unmentionables. Things that have caused me shame in my life. Things that a few people know and maybe more than I think know because you just never know if your secrets are held sacred after you utter them. I wish I could go back in time, I wish it so badly. But I can’t. The ‘damage’ is done and I have to live on. But this thing called shame is paralyzing. Its like you walk one egg shells hoping you won’t be found out, like living while looking over your shoulder everyday. I can’t do that anymore. I won’t. There is no power in pretense. There is no glory in being discreet if your deeds haunt you, if you can’t forgive yourself. I’m for women. ALL of us. I love my prayer warriors and my jump off’s, and my paid hoes and poor sluts. I have been them all, unwillingly perhaps, led by fear most probably, trying to survive mostly. 20150402_071924

The fat gene won a few times but…

I know what its like to feel the thrust of man’s third leg inside me that didn’t care about me. I know what its like to “pretend” not to care while I let him do it too! I know what its like to latch on to someone because I thought this was the last train for me, that this was the best I’d ever get. I know what its like to pretend not to want anything so I’d be free feeling what I thought was inevitable disappointment. I know what its like to have a baby to keep the peace and get rid of one to keep “my peace”. I have been homeless. I have slept in my car. I know what a grocery store run feels like when you only have 5 dollars in your pocket for peanut butter and bread, but I also know what its like to give my savings away to my man’s next big business venture only to have nothing but a garage full of  novelty trash that wouldn’t sell. I fought the fat gene, won a few times, lost a few and Im winning right now and have a deeper understanding to stay here too.

Dear God, it’s me Salkis!

I spent a lot of time trying figure out what I wanted to do, what I wanted to be good at.. But that voice in my head was always nagging at me, telling me this ain’t gonna work or that ain’t gonna work. I even thought that being dark skin was a curse. I think I was 11 or 12 years old when I’d have frequent ‘talks’ with God about my complexion and I’d make deals with him I’d pass all my math tests and stop stealing the Fig Newtons out the cookie jar if he just would make me lighter skinned. Every morning, I ran to the mirror believing something changed, but there I was, just the same as the night before.

African American Artist
Daddy, Mommy and Me

I’d say: “You don’t love me God, if you did, you’d answer my prayers….”

Sex and donuts…

This is why I speak of self esteem and self awareness so much. I can see in the eyes of many women, the anguish, the confusion, the fear and dissatisfaction within their existence. I know it well. Even the psychics and the oracles can’t hide that look from me.  I know what they are feeling too. Bravado means nothing. The “I can do what I want to do” doesn’t mean a hill of beans. Its like one rice grain to a hungry belly. Only the strong will survive? No. Not true. Only the people who make the right decisions at the right time survive, only those who exercise purposeful discipline will survive. Much of our bumps in the road is do to lack of discipline, laziness, gluttony, focus. These things make one sick, broke, unhealthy etc.. Good sex is pleasurable, and I don’t know about you but glazed donut makes me hum my favorite tune. But are they good for us just because they bring us pleasure? That is what we have to reason out with the decisions we make.

So I decided that my goal, what I wanted to center myself around was love, self love in particular, but all aspects of it because it shapes and influences every part of our lives. I want love to be simple. I want the me that I was before I thought I needing fixing, the me that I was before the need to repair.. Before I was 11 years old I suppose….

If you’re like me, then you’d appreciate the Art walk back in time. Introspection is healing Click Here

natural hair styles

Natural Hair and Self love The Easy Escape

natural hair styles

Im an artist right. I paint little girls and young ladies with natural hair right. I know the importance of imagery and their power to alter the perceptions of one’s self worth. I didn’t see what I paint when I was growing up. No symbols of affection and love for my “kind”. And I get it. Every black girl needs a super hero, an alter ego like the boys have with their Transformers, G.I.Joes, Batman etc.

But what do we really have?

Continue reading “Natural Hair and Self love The Easy Escape”

Your a Mean One Ms Grinch: Cosmic love??

So, I Really, really do not believe in “cosmic love”, I hear all these wonderful, dare I say narcotic influenced definitions of love. MOSTLY FROM women who swear their lovers come to their dreams and they time travel while having sex on shooting stars… Sigh.. I love hearing the stories though. It entertains me much like a good book you read then put away until u need to be entertained again.

Are they listening to what they are saying though. Do their partners feel the same way? Is this all because the “nut” was really good? How on earth can they say that their love is unconditional? How do you decide that you want to be with this person as opposed that person without some process of logic and reason. What makes you think he is the one if there is nothing to quantify?

These are tall tales women are telling, mostly to justify mistakes or their need for indulgences. To me, these things are merely coping stories concocted to take them “off the hook” and not be responsible for the things they do with partners or lovers. All this fluff, but in the after glow, or that “pillow talk” they ask him: “Why Do You Love Me” as they gleefully wait with bated breath (you egomaniacs) for the praises of their magnificent love and vaginas.

What is wrong with setting boundaries, or having standards when it comes to love? How many heartbreaks does it take to understand that HEART AND MIND need to be present when dealing with the will power of men.

Yeah Yeah, I know… it’s deeper than physical as some of you say. But how do you maintain a relationship that is non-physical? Air kisses, mental “I love you’s” and monopoly money to pay the rent?

I can’t with all this fluff. But I do appreciate the creative ways we lie to ourselves..it makes for great poetry…

Here’s to love, by whatever means I you experience it!