Work Without Pain

racist cartoons and postcards
“Blacky” Art by Salkis RE

Smiling..

SO you ladies know about my You Tube channel; I hope…..

And it’s so interesting to me when the guys muster up enough interest to comment on the content of my videos.

And what’s even more interesting is the context of their statements are always the same.

“Some dude must have really hurt you”, Or “You are just unattractive, their isn’t an issue with black women” Or “I like Your Mouth” etc..

 

The comments are always slight jabs or deliberate stabs at MY looks or MY temperament and not much is ever mentioned about the content itself.

 

This is why I advise ladies to be aware of “presentation”.

Though I will admit that I’m not a real life example of “perfect” presentation, I understand its power.

I understand that most of the time, its all the power you need really.

its never what you its: HOW you say it.

Its never about what you do: Its HOW you do it….

What’s the difference between a Sex Surrogate and a Prostitute?

The Answer: And OFFICE 

 

People generally are interested in the surface stuff. Ok, let me stop talking in third person and talk to YOU right now..

YOU are concerned with surface stuff, with how you APPEAR to other people. You want people to think you are HAPPY, SUCCESSFUL, LOVED, INTELLIGENT, SEXY etc..

But how do you TRULY feel? NO as good as the pretense you give off?

abstract portrait painting
“Powder” Original Abstract Portrait by Salkis RE

I understand.. Believe me I do…

And the tragedy of that is that YOU spend so much time in that space,

the pretending part of your life,

that you put off all the elements that could actually assist you in truly feeling self worth and self esteem.

YOU have come to learn that the SHOW is all that matters because the show is all anyone sees…

WRONG!!!

What you feel about yourself manifests in ALLLLLLLLL your decisions.

Everything  you decide to do, that you decide is right, that you think is wrong is shaped around YOUR PERCEPTION OF YOUR VALUE!!

SO guess what?!

People see the real you by way of your ACTIONS 

You don’t get to hide low self esteem as well as you think you are doing…

It shows through, and these men quickly find out how fraudulent you are WHEN HE GETS TO NOW YOU

And eventually you expose your weaknesses as you sit there perplexed as to why he doesn’t show up in your life anymore like he used too..

You showed your hand, your TRUE hand, and it was an insecure hand, a hand full of nothingness,

and the conclusion was that you really aren’t worth the effort or the sacrifice…

 

All MAN/Woman has the power to do is MAKE YOU AN OFFER, that is where their power begins and ends…

YOU get to decide if that offer is sufficient and if you will take it.

You get to negotiate the rules of engagement.

And your rules are your expectations

and your expectations are your boundaries,

and your boundaries are your protection..

ANYTHING OFFERED THAT IS NOT IN LINE WITH WHAT YOU WANT IS AN OFFENSE..

Remember That!

 

Who Am I ?

dark skin women
Life Coach~Salkis Re

Salkis Re is a world Renown Artist and Life Coach

who uses offers therapy through art imagery which serves as the soothing

part to her tough love coaching style to help women heal from pain and trauma..

Want more? Click Here

 

Men Want Women To Like Them!

Men are curious creatures ready to play.

The problem is that they have no conscious about “playing” with YOUR life and your emotions.

Given the opportunity they will test you, and the testing assists them in finding a way into your heart.

That’s all courtship is really.

Courtship is the process of making you feel good while he takes you through behavioral modification.

Beautiful Black women with thick locs
Artist/Life Coach ~Salkis Re

 

 

 

His job is to alter your perception, to make you feel something for him,

to move away from your normal programming so you will want to fit him into your life..

So what’s the true tea here?

DECEPTION and COURTSHIP go hand in hand.

But it’s a beautiful thing. Courtship is seduction and seduction feels really good

because it allows us the opportunity to escape reality through his pleasantries..

Except it.

Expect it.

 

Because you’re doing also, you are doing it so he can fall in love, and he’s doing it so he can fuck you into loving him!

And the gag is that men will lay the burden of truth on you.

They will say that “you should’ve know better” or “you should’ve chosen better”

which is an admission that you shouldn’t choose with your heart but with your heart.

But the quagmire here is that they don’t feel that you value them UNTIL you display an emotional investment in them.

 

So what should you do?

Should you maintain your reasonableness and risk being viewed as a contemptuous,

heartless-bitch, or do you strive for creating a “real” emotional bond,

throw caution to the wind, and give him what he desires most?

I’d say that your lane oscillates between the two.

You want to show that you are interested, but not gullible.

You want be kind, but not compromising.

You want to be optimistic, yet sensible and observant.

You cannot be just one or the other because on one end you’ll look like a desperate fool,

and other you’ll look like a desperate bitch!

Thick Locs
iLoveHerArt.com

Most men will talk your panties down are pimps.

And pimps are: smooth talking ramblers who speak in ELOQUENT INSINCERITY.

Know this, what he wants to do, what he would like to do,
what he wishes he could do,
what he’s “going” to do
and what he’s thinking about doing have NOTHING to do with you!!
Making decisions about the direction of your life based on the “hypothetical” indecisions of men will be round about the time you make your biggest misjudgment.

 

All these do is serve to create a “feeling” that “something”

is about to be done so you can gamble on your faith that it will.

So the order of the day is to take optimal care of yourself FIRST!

This means that you trust your instincts;

you move only when you are comfortable;

you keep your purpose and your mission in the forefront of your mind

ALWAYS! And know that what he offers you has to be in line with your purpose PERIOD!

 

If you need to talk, I’m HERE

“T.I Cheated on Tiny AGAIN????

“T.I Cheated on Tiny AGAIN???

So the gag is that Tiny, T.I’s wife is a fool for staying with Tip because once again he is caught cheating.
Some of y’all say she has no self esteem because she keeps forgiving him for his infidelity.

That could very well be the case, but let me say something about commitment: it is a sacrifice!!!
She took him in at the height of her career with escape, he was TI back then, he wasn’t anything, but she backed him.

She gave him the best years of her life and 5 children. She gave him passes, and threesomes too. She got surgery to keep her tits and ass tight and high, she took the charge when they got caught with cocaine in they car, she stayed chase while he was doing his bid in jail.

Black love

And guess what? HE STILL CHEATED over and over and over again.

So what SHOULD that tell you ladies. What should be included in all those seminars, You tube vids, vegan potlucks, yoni egg user brigades and the like, need to just say what is inevitable, what is highly probable, what is almost a guarantee if your make has a half way working penis and/or a little bit of money. And that is that men CHEAT.

You are killing yourself trying to hold it together for HIM, when all he wants is simply someone NEW. Your loyalty doesn’t mean shit, how much of the rent you can pay or even if you’re paying ALL of the rent, it doesn’t mean shit, you can think you’re hot or maybe you actually are hot, and guess what?
It doesn’t matter!!!

So Tiny should walk away from time and money SHE put into him so he can be free and clear to dick hop? She can move out the house and get a condo across town with a nice looking Guy Friday who comes to check her “plumbing”, but divorce?
Divorce him to do what? Date again?
To find another fool that just wants to say he fucked T.I’s ex wife?
NO! She should ride it out. Ride that shit into the sunset and find joy however she can because at this stage the odds that she can pull another T.I is slim.

She got time and the stamina to build up another man at this stage of her life?
And at is the point of all of that when all roads still lead to what she is facing now..

She need to do what Snoop Dog wife did: visit down and let him figure it out while the bag keeps coming in

Tiny, monitor your bag. The rest is irrelevant… Period…
Take the Black Pill!!

“Life Coach”
~Salkis Re

The “Black Pill” He WANTS TO FOOK ANOTHER WOMAN!

So here is the deal. If you are with a man, and he has fooked you at least 50 times, then he probably,
in all likelihood, wishes he had the opportunity to fook a “new” woman!
 
It doesn’t matter how pretty your are or “think you are”, HE WILL WANT ANOTHER WOMAN.
Why?
Because you are no longer a novelty, that’s why. And being “new” is what creates sexual excitement/attraction in men.
Him only having eyes for you is a joke, an UNREALITY, a delusional of grandeur on your part at best.
He WANT’s TO FOOK ANOTHER WOMAN, SO GET OVER IT!!
 
I do not care how fat your arse is; I don’t care how perfect your skin is; I don’t care if your hip to waist ratio is spot on. NONE of that matters if he has put his “peenus” in every hole in your body that the Lord hath made…
HE’S DONE WITH YOU. MISSION COMPLETE!
hypergamy and mgtow
Hypergamy IS A WOMAN’S WAY!!

Now, we do try desperately to stave off our worn out vaginas

Now, we do try desperately to stave off our worn out vaginas by wearing new hair do’s and clothes, some of y’all graceless, wobbly arses take poll dancing lessons, role play in bed, and the really desperate ones invite other women in for a knock down drag out mucus, piss and shyte swapping brigade of funk-filled sex (for which I HAVE found my dumb arse recruiting chics to join my ‘team” back in the day, but luckily nobody was interested in fooking the man I was with, *the irony).
 

Don’t let Yourself GO!

Anyway, So the deal isn’t to let yourself go, you still have to take your fat arse to the gym, eat right , smell good, look good. Don’t stop trying to improve yourself because the odds of infidelity are high.
 
You want to improve yourself SO that you can COLLECT YOUR COINS so that you are only enduring emotional struggles from a man with resources instead of some hungry-ass, bathing once duh week nagga who washes his car more than he washes his nut sack!
black women with locs
Life Coach/Artist ~Salkis Re
 
It’s time to stop the fear you have over him wanting another women, he DOES.
Now What?
What are you going to do to SECURE your life so that whatever happens, you are not left sick, old and penniless?
 
This is why CONNECTION doesn’t matter.
This is why ATTRACTION doesn’t matter.
This is why VIRTUE doesn’t matter.
This is why BEAUTY doesn’t matter.
This is why CLASS doesn’t matter.
 
Sis, step back. Take a breath. Stop fighting with the selfishness of his mind.
It’s a waste of time and energy, and you can’t afford to give those away.
 
But you know what this really means about sexuality?
It means that we are not wired to have sex as frequently as we do.
This means that sex ‘drive’ is manufactured and created through
over stimulation” through programming social “norms” about what sex drive is.
Beautiful African American Women
 
Biologically, when a man ejaculates in you, and does it a few times, his mission is complete.
His sex drive naturally diminishes and he no longer has
a biological or a psychological need to continue mating with you.
 
Now some will say that this is because men are wired to spread their seed around
because he could cum every day if he were screwing a new woman every day.
 
but that is not healthy for HIM either.
Arousal is manipulated by our environment.
And truth be told, men with nothing to do, no goals, or a drive
to make major accomplishments have an excessive drive for sex.
To me, a man who stays busy WORKING, TOILING, INVENTING,
and hardly any time for me, is a perfect guy.
Get the COINS BOO!

What my help to deprogram yourself from your disease to please and worry about men?

Find my books and coaching services:  here

“Black Hat Wisdom”
~Salkis

“Don’t Like Sex SOOO MUCH GIRL!!!”

 

If you want to get money or resources out of a man, then NEVER act like you like sex as much as he does. Its masculine, and to get taken care of, you must act feminine or a “damsel in distress”.

If you are showing lust and encouraging talks about how you can do Olympic feats of Water Park style SQUIRTING on your 300 thread count sheets, you are going to make him think that his “peens” can be EQUAL in exchange of value when you do have sex..

Is it?……….

NOT if you are trying to be cared for: HELL NAWL its NOT!

Hide your lust. Do not offer conversations about how skilled YOU are.

If you must go there, simply indulge in his need to express what he likes and take note,

giggle, blush, and keep it classy…

abstract portrait painting
iLoveHerArt.com

Why would you do this?

To establish that you are here to RECEiVE and his JOB as a man to to give IN EVERY WAY.

AND the sex he offers is NOT PAYMENT or COMPENSATION for the time your are spending with him..

That is the trap you pseudo feminists are getting yourself into.

The equality of the sexuality is NOT beneficial to women who want to portion themselves to be some man’s SUGAR BABY.

 

In order for a man to feel compelled to take care of you in any way,

he has to feel like you NEED him, he has to feel like he can solve your problems and rescue you.

And you cannot pull of the DAMSEL ideal by matching him it wit and sexual brawn.

Abstract Portrait Painting
Art by Salkis Re for SalkisRe.com

Think delicate.

Think soft.

Think charm.

Think beauty.

RUN from the modern notions of womanhood and all that WOMAN CAN DO WHAT MEN DO

IF the goal is to be a woman getting her bills paid by a ma who is madly in love with her.

It takes work. More work than I care to admit or WANT to do myself.

I fought the need to do all this nonsense for soooo many years and pissed away a large portion of my own sexual fertility shadow boxing with the notion that I too had to be vulnerable.

But I was thinking of it all wrong, it’s not about BEING vulnerable, its about ACTING vulnerable.

And these are two entirely different things.

sexy women

 

So my advice to you is not think of yourself as dumbing down your brilliance .

Think of all the feminine charm as a TOOL to sift your brilliance through,

because if your smarts doesn’t pad up your bottom line, then you are living “stupidly” anyway…

Fight this if you want too, and all you’ll have left is a mouth full of spermatozoa and an empty change purse..

What more help? Find my books and coaching services  here

“Black Hat Wisdom”
~Salkis

 

 

Men Shouldn’t Have to PAY???

Male Viewer’s Comment to another Male Viewer on my You Tube Video:

“As long as you allow yourself to be USED by a woman she will never LOVE you or see you as a “companion”. She’ll only see you as an “employee”, a “mule”, or her “workhorse.
YOU CAN NOT BUY LOVE.
Also, you should NOT be giving a woman “things” when you date, because you’re only training her to be with you for “things” instead of being with you for YOU and appreciating you as a PERSON and appreciating your friendship and companionship.”
End Quote

interracial dating

 

😼MY RESPONSE:
And if you are not “useful” she will never love either. Love is a “decision” based on opportunity and value displayed in “both” sides.
You guys think it’s unfair that a woman’s value/beauty/sex is equivalent to what you bring as men, but it’s because YOU ALL who express its importance, display favorable behaviors towards it, and make judgements and decisions that reflect how valuable it is.

We don’t make a man’s “looks” the main issue,
and MANY MANY women in relationships while SEXUALLY DISSATISFIED yet THEY STAY.
We compromise and “settle” all day long, so join the club!! Love you say?
You want “free” love?
When have you EVER had that? When HAVE YOU EVER GIVEN THAT???😼
~Salkis Re

abstract portrait painting
Abstract Portrait Painting by Salkis Re for www.iloveherart.com

Now I posted this because I’m basically tired of this repeated narrative from men who want FREE love. None of them give anything without the intention of getting a return, but they argue about what they are expected to do to win a woman’s heart.

Are any of these men leading households: I doubt it.

Are these types of men inspired to commit to a ONE woman, I think it would be difficult for them.

These men always talk about virtue when they do not want to spend any money. But sacrifice is the barometer of the level of care a man OR woman has for the other person.

There is no way to measure your worth without compromise and sacrifice. You don’t know how important you are or how important a person thinks you are until  inconvenience presents itself…

And don’t you ladies think for one-second that these men do not understand the concept of “struggle”.

Frankly, I don’t see how you could think any other way when they repeatedly talk about “building together”.

Do you know what that term  “BUILDING TOGETHER means?

It means I cannot afford to take care of you,

and I want you to understand that,

and I want you to work to help me provide for you,

because then I will know you want me for me and not the money I don’t have

Then and only then have you earned their best efforts?? Through sacrifice and struggle we know right?

But the only problem with that is that the odds are not good for women when they invest in relationships that way.

Honestly, these are poor peoples problems ; wealthy people have a firm grasp of profit-loss, risk-reward, investment-liability. They understand that you can’t get something for nothing.

They understand  that you have to pay for what you want.

Sounds transactional right?

Tell me when is it not transactional?

You are both are INVESTING time, energy, resources, your bodies into each other. Relationships are INVESTMENTS, why else would you need or even want to commit to one person for the rest of your life if there was no gain to be had?

That is the cold, HARD truth!

Deal with it!!!!

………………………………………………………………………….

 

So Who Am I?

African American art
“Artist/Life Coach”
~Salkis Re

Well, Im a black woman.

A black woman who low self worth, low self esteem and self doubt for much of my life. I never felt like I belonged anywhere, well at least anywhere I wanted to be. So I adopted an aggressive, over sensitive attitude to protect myself from being hurt by people. I tried to do things to face like skin bleaching and severe weight loss diets in hopes of transforming myself into a gorgeous woman entitled to respect and love.

I did so many things under the guise of self improvement and ended up damaging by physical body while creating more to hate about myself.

I’ve learned a lot along the way to self efficacy.  And it didn’t come from new make up techniques or having longer hair.

It really came from facing my demons and all the repetitive dialog I had in my head about my self worth.

In my awakening, a heightened level of creativity emerged.black artists

A new level of femininity and my own brand of sensuality came to the surface too.

I want to show you how to accept who you are, TOTALLY and open the flood gates to your own authentic, wild, unconventional representation of your best self. FLAWS AND ALL.

If that sounds like something that you want, please give me a shout by email: salkis@iloveherart.com

Or if you are ready to take the chance and take a plunge, book a session HERE

 

 

Ok, sigh…

I have been getting so much comments from males about their perception of what black women choose for dating /Marriage etc. The repetitive talk is this “Black women ONLY want Attractive/Rich men”.
Where these men get these notions from, I have no idea but I’m going to clear it up today.

MOST women are with unattractive men. This could mean unattractive as in literally *ugly or unattractive as in SHE LOOKS BETTER THAN HE DOES. Most women are falling into one of either of those catergories.

Women with locs
Artist/Life Coach/Medicine Woman ~Salkis Re

And why is this? Because ALL men seek out women who are attractive whether they themselves posses handsomeness or not; this is how men are wired to choose.
And for women, a man’s looks generally comes in second place to the size of his wallet(security) so the emotional needs of men and women actually compliment each other.

Look around you… How many brothers do you come across in your day that look like a 10?? Even a 7??? There are NOT that many “really attractive”, and there are not too many above average men out here either.

And the gag is that men who make bank, who gather REAL BAGS are VERY “average” looking. But God bless the suit and tie because they can easily bring a man up 2-3 notches in the looks department.

Most women are or will be with men who are “odd looking” disporportion noses and lips, big ears with a little mouth, etc. But generally, his face doesn’t have perfect symmetry. But she loves him anyway.

Most women will not be with men who match her beauty, but that is ok cause it really works in our favor in end.

The moral is this: Men want women that look better than them, and women want men to earn more than them.

And everybody is looking for somebody who is better than themselves, so nobody hardly ever gets everything they want. We are all “SETTLING” at the end of the day…

AUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
“The Black Hat Society”
Life Coach
Salkis Re

Struggle Love

We are now asking ourselves these days: why does love have to be soooo damn complicated??

We want that easy love. That Sunday morning in bed kinda love.

That fix me a sandwich after sex kinda love…

Can we be that happy all of the time?

Should we just reduce ourselves to the doom and glom of ‘reality”?????

WeLp, Yea and No!

Sunshine and rain make flowers grow. Snow and spring both bring beauty and deep contemplations..

Life cannot be all roses, but the darkness do not have to kill you…

Beautiful African American Women

A relationship is EARNED according to my sprint mother Eartha Kitt!

A relationship is given on the merit of good will and best practices, not of irrealities like NEVER doing this or that…

When you understand your flaws and shortcomings, you will naturally have patience and understanding for the hiccups in the person you love..

That is what true love is.

Click this Picture to Watch My video About Colorism for Dark Skin Women

 

There is no nothing perfect about love, nothing at all.

But improvement and advancement are the things we should always strive for within ourselves and to inspire those we love..

If you are not improving in some way, love with wither.

If you are not smarter today than you were yesterday,

if you are not more curious about life and learning how to change yourself for the better, then you will be forgotten..

That’s how this thing works.

Just like stagnant water is unsafe to drink, a body and mind immovable and unchallenged will atrophy over time..

Renew yourself. Continously.

That is how you keep struggle love at bay…

 So Who Am I?

African American art
              “Artist/Life Coach”
                    ~Salkis Re

I help women heal from relationships so they can gain the strength to reset their path in life.

Health and Wellness, Spirituality and Creativity are my specific interests.

If you need one on one instruction from me go to my website or email me at salkis@iloveherart.com

Subscribe to this blog and share with all those you know***

 

Nappy-Headed “Spiritual” Hoes

Life Coach, Salkis Re

“Men Who Want Natural Sisters be like”
A man who has no aspirations for “worldly” things has nothing to lose. And a man who has nothing to lose ALSO has no incentive to commit nor sacrifice for HIMSELF or YOU.

Statistically they earn less, do not get married, have no formal education, and have fatherless children. A Relationship (while on the physical plane) IS a material act.

From your first date that you dress up for, to the gas you put in your car to meet her at the “park to talk”, to the penis that goes into the vagina, to the babies that are birthed as a result of sex. All material.

Natural Hair
SalkisRe.com

Only men with little ambition ride the “Spirituality” wave because they assume that “natural sistahs” only want a tub of Shea butter from the street vendor and a meat-free gravy and brown rice on a styrofoam plate to make us happy.

Meanwhile, he is out here heckling BUT secretly lusting after those “material girls” for whom his pockets aren’t deep enough to get. It’s a game to exploit your compassion and steal your “understanding” and your “agreeableness” for “duty-free”, “effortless pussy” nothing more.

 

When the talk of Spirituality comes up in a conversation about relationships and this conversation is directed towards any “nappy-headed sista (and I this term with endearment) I gonna need for you to understand that a net is being cast out to your vagina FREE PUSSY.

And what is the truth here?

The truth is that you are MORE SPIRITUAL WITHOUT DIK than with it so his job is to bring MATERIAL things to your feet to PAY for the “blessings” he is hoping to receive from YOUUUUU.

~Salkis Re

African American art
“Artist/Life Coach”
~Salkis Re

So Who Am I?

“Artist/ Life Coach”
~Salkis Re
Art by Salkis Re
Get My Artwork and Coaching Services here: www.iloveherart.com

Spiritual Relationships are Bullshyte!

 

Abstract Art
“Be Who You Are” Art by Salkis Re

“Spiritual Connection”
Written by Salkis Re

What is that “Connection” that you feel when you’re describing that new man you want to be with?
Well this is the breakdown of the process by which that “connection” is created.

The connection that you refer to as a “spiritual connection” is an emotional assessment of how well you “relate” to him.

Spiritual equates to Emotional, and your emotions are based on your feelings.

And your Feelings are based on your Thoughts

AND your Thoughts are filtered and categorized by what you see, hear, touch: HIS ACTIONs…..

You cannot experience “Spirituality” without emotions and emotions is Energy created by movement=ACTION.
So when you speak of a “spiritual connection” as something “Nonphysical”,

you are misinformed and that farce leads many assuming women down a path of unmet expectations.

Let’s put on our Black Hats shall we….
What part of a male and female romantic or even platonic relationship is Nonphysical?
🤔He has to talk to you: that is a physical act.

🤔He has to spend time with you: that’s a physical act.

🤗He has to fucc you: that’s a physical act.

🤔He has to show care for you: that’s a physical act.

🤔He has to appreciate you: that’s a physical act.

🤔🤔He has to commit to you: that’s a physical limitations of choice and movement toward any other woman besides you.

We like to believe in things to make feel better about things we are powerless over or lack comprehension in.

 

🌼But the “spiritual” talk is mostly the ponderings and entertainment of women who are attracted to “Unresourceful Men”, for these men ONLY have the power of EMOTION to fuccing sell you on, nothing more.

😏🙄😱😮He can tell you that he’s looking for virtue because he thinks your lack attractiveness means that you are MORE MORAL than a woman who is physically out of his league.

AND THIS IS THE GOSPEL ACCORDING to SALKIS RE
AUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

“Artist/Life Coach
~Salkis Re
Art by Salkis Re