Making Decisions Based On What You Are Is A Mistake!!

Young Women.

Let me talk to you.
What our society will influence you to do is to enjoy the moment.

Your friends, maybe even your well-meaning but unwise mother

will push you into believing that you are to young to plan for your future today.

Focus on your Career

(when what you really have is a “job” not a career) is what they say.

Travel the world

(and you spend money you had to save the whole year to purchase a trip you can’t afford truly to take)
DO YOU, is what they exclaim over and over again,

and the doing of YOU evolves around instantaneous

pleasures and making decisions based on what you are at this moment..

Let me explain this to you. Make decisions based on

what you want your “future” to be, NOT on what you are right now.

Abstract portrait painting
Self Esteem Coach, Salkis Re Art by Salkis Re

Why?
Because what you are right now is TRANSIENT.

You won’t be what you are right now in 20 years,

the calls for dates or sex will slow down or stop altogether.

The “options” that you have today will NOT be here in in 10 years, so you must plan.

EVERYTHING you do is an investment in your future, from what you eat,

to who you have sex with,

to the children you have or decided NOT to have based on

THIS MOMENT INSTEAD OF YOUR FUTURE SELF

will affect your tomorrow.
We are not men.

African Art
Artist, Author, Life Coach; Salkis Re

Thinking whole-listically is necessary for survival for us

because our worth is judged by TIME.

Nobody is going to tell you this but me..

And though I struggle daily with the relevance of social media.
And I admittedly grow impatient by the day for the

emotional prattling of women

who habitually deflect and deny to promote and maintain their facade.
But I have a mission here.

A mission to help you see things before

you become another case study or statistic..

So plan out your day.
Leave NOTHING to chance.

Carry On..

“Your Self Esteem Coach”
~Salkis Re

Why should you listen to me?

 

Because I’m CRAZY, a nonconfirmist, AND an introvert who had to bind her insecurities and throw that bitch in the closet so I could pound the pavement and be found by good women like you!

“Your Self Esteem Coach”
~Salkis Re

Need My Help? Send me an email to info@salkisre.com

Ready to take a chance and get some badass wisdom to turn your life around now? Click Here

 
beautiful black women with locs
Self Esteem Coach, Salkis Re

1# BEST Way to Accomplish ALL Your Goals

African Art

Achieving Your Goals Is Not Done With Vision Boards!

Authenticity is overrated.
And it will halt all your goals.
And people will shame you for pretending.
And you’ll feel ashamed for pretending.
Then you will go back to what you know.

Then realize -AGAIN- that it doesn’t work.
Then you’ll revisit trying to change.
And you’ll conclude that being unlike the real you is better.
Now all that’s left, is to be that pretender
until you forget that it’s not what you are….

——————————————–

It might feel icky to be a fraud,

but that only because you believe that everyone around is telling

you the truth while being themselves.

You are being humored every DAY.

People are polite, act like they are interested in what you have to say,

some even pretend to be impressed

and attracted to you.

And here you are,

afraid to fail them by adopting a personality to fix your own life,

to get you results that could make you better.

So tell me this, how do you change while staying the same?

How do you grow while staying the same?

How can you get something you’ve never gotten before while having the same mentality?

I’ll answer the answer: It cannot be done!!

Continue reading “1# BEST Way to Accomplish ALL Your Goals”

3 Simple Ways to Get Him Chasing You Again!

You try to fix your relationship

When you try to fix a relationship by giving, you actually make him pull away further.

You don’t reward a complacent heart with charitable humility!!!

Don’t be so hard on yourself, you will do better.

What happens with most of us is that at the first sign of trouble,

you spring into action with a checklist of everything you have to do to win him back.

You make yourself more available to him on every level!

holistic wellness for Black women
Your self Esteem Coach, Salkis Re

Cook meals:
Lose 10 pounds:
Have more sex:
Say YES to whatever he wants:

 

 

And you turn him off even further!!

You think:

“It makes me feel good when a man goes out of his

way to give me what I want,

so it must work the other way around as well.”

But it’s exactly the opposite.
Men love what they give YOU, not how you cater to them..

 

LOVE is about what a person is compelled to do to EARN your affection.

If a woman gives him everything he wants

without him having to work for it, will he treasure it, respect it?

 

👉He treasures what he has to take care of!!
👉He respect what he invest in.
👉He desires what’s hard for him to get..

 

So the goal here is to RELAX, the worst thing you can

do is act like you are afraid to lose him.

Fear and anxiety sends a message that you are unworthy

and that he is worth more to the relationship than you are…

 

It’s not the time to do anything he wants

 

 

It’s not the time to do anything he wants,

its time to make him feel good about giving to you again..

Why do you think when you break up with men

that they start acting well behaved and attentive?

They do this because you have shown him that you are unafraid of living

without him if necessary and that your comfort has to be

his goal too or consequences will be activated..

And let me be clear here, it’s not about making verbal

demands and increasing your sass my dear.

Arguing is a sign of emotional weakness and it

acting is a sign that you are unsure of yourself.

 

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO……

 

 1-Get quiet and strategic when he starts acting a fool.

Be even more unbothered emotionally than ever before.

2-Give him his space.

3-Don’t confirm or deny anything.

 

Make it clear what has to happen in order for you

to care about him again, then leave him to decide.

It has to be his decision not your forced ultimatum.

 

beautiful black women with locs

Who Am I?

A “Self Esteem Coach”

Helping Black Women get knowledge about love,

Themselves

and Holistic Living.

Need some advice and guidance?

Send me an email to info@salkisre.com

Ready to have a one on one session with me?

You can book it right here

Be sure before you leave to grab your Free E-BOOK here

 

Dark Skin Women Get No Love From Dark Skin Men???

One of my viewers made a comment on my “Are Dark Skin Men The Enemy”
I did that video because Sooooooo many dark skin women have sentiments of
struggle and trauma around getting a dark skin man
want her or keeping the relationship positive and respectful.

She Stated:
“I was told by a Light Skin woman that her mother
told her to get the dark skin
man you could find and he would work like a “slave”
and cater to you, then you won’t have to work.
She married the dark skin man but she’s “in love”
with a light skin man who treats her like shyte!!”
End Quote
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
life coach for black women

YOU ARE SLAVES to THEM!!


I told you men previously that a whole LOT of you are work mules and called
a stupid MONKEYS when these women huddle in secret sister circles to
swap tactics and brag about what you do for them.
Spiritual Life Coach for Black Women
Your Self Esteem Coach: Salkis Re


I am Not Blaming Light Skin Women


The problem is not in your choice to love NOR is it with Light Skin women,
it’s the extra verbal condemning of women who more times than not actually
HAVE or COULD HAVE “genuine” feelings of endearment and concern for you.
You’ll call dark women names (and clown us WITH your light SKIN girlfriend)
because you are of the impression that you are MONKEY STATUS EXEMPT
because you can throw her a few yards and have a nice ride???
How Sway??

You will Choose A Woman Who Does Not Want You Again!!


You think that because you can make her moan
that you are disqualified from the classification you put dark women in??

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
Lol This “enthusiastic” dating style has got y’all running after women who

are fucking other men behind your back, taking
YOUR money to help the man -she actually IS in love with- pay a few bills and so on..

Don’t I always say: “We are always looking for someone
BETTER than ourselves” And that this is exactly why we get out hearts broken!!!
Carry On

beautiful black women
Who Am I?

“Your Self Esteem Coach”
“Spiritual Advisor”
“Artist”
“Writer”
“Poet”
Need an emergency coaching session?
Have a question? goto- salkis@iloveherart.com

We Are Not Like Men, But We Can Be Guided By Them”

“We Are Not Like Men, But We Can Be Guided By Them”
Transit time January 25, 2019 3:45 a.m.
🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻

Dark skin women
Your Self Esteem Coach, Salkis Re

👉Men: Give Love /
Women: React

👉Men: Say What They Have Knowledge In/  Women: Say What you Want to hear.

👉Men: Are Vulnerable Mentally /
Women: Are vulnerable Physically

👉Men: Are Impersonal /
Women: Take Everything Personally

👉Men: Fascinated by Reasoning/
Women: Bored and find Reasoning exhausting

👉Men: Praise/  Women: Criticize

👉Men: Invent/  Women: Imitate

I am NOT pointing out these thing as a suggestion that we try to act like men, the goal here is for you to start learning about yourself so that you can be a more effective communicator with men AND you will also being to understand why you say/do the thing YOU do.

And this is why we get repetitiously limited results

And this is why we get repetitiously limited results in our lives as women. We need men to balance us, but women are so broken by numerous failed relationships that every character trait you posses is now pathological in scope.

We fake like we are unicorns flowing through life unbothered, yet it’s part of our disposition to be pretentious and critical of everything EXCEPT ourselves.

KNOWING how you tick means that you know what your triggers

KNOWING how you tick means that you know what your triggers are and how to shift away from a behavior that doesn’t give you the results you’re looking for.

We need to be seen, we NEED to be acknowledged and this need is easily exploitable by men people they have the upper hand of logic and analysis.

You THINK with your body

THINK with your body. You filter your world through a sense of what’s hot or cold, not wrong or right.
So walking with the awareness of this truth allows you to step back a bit because you are giving your body time to settle down so that you can THINK instead of REACT.

A little more mindfulness can help you dodge so many bullets

Take your first tiny little step towards happiness by simply acknowledging that you don’t think things through in the way that you should, and vow to only make a decisions after thinking them through first. A little more mindfulness can help you dodge so many bullets and WILL change your entire life!😉

“Your Self Esteem Coach”
~Salkis Re

Do you want me to help figure out what to do? Drop me a quick email at salkis@iloveherart.com

Please share this post with your friends, colleagues, daughters and mothers😉

“Why You Will Get Hurt Again”

Written by Salkis Re

The truth of the matter is that most women will not change unless

there is some enjoyment attached to the task.

Women always need something new to look like or be.
We don’t innovate, we only mimic and

copy what we see other women do,

partly because we are communal by nature and mainly because

we are emotional and you do not posses the instinct to take risks..

We are unable to be objective because we judge everything by how we feel..

Logic is boring and uninteresting to us

Logic is boring and uninteresting to us and we dismiss things that

do not make us the center of attention.

Your vanity, your need to be SEEN is what has caused most

of the heart break you’ve experienced..

And because you communicate with your

body and you think with your body,

You process your environment by how you feel..

dark skin women

you will more than likely make decisions that are not

reasonable and you will be hurt again…
You need some in your mouth that’s sweet,

you something in your vagina that feels good,

you need constant stimulation or

you feel invisible and a loss of self worth…

Compare some these attributes of men and women

MEN: Give Love / Women: React

MEN: Say What They Have Knowledge In/  Women: Say What you Want to hear.

Men: Are Vulnerable Mentally /  Women: Are vulnerable Physically

Men: Are Impersonal /  Women: Take Everything Personally

Men: Fascinated by Reasoning/  Women: Bored and Exhausted by Reasoning

Men: Praise/  Women: Criticize

Men: invent/  Women: imitate

It is what it is..

But once we have understanding of ourselves we

can manipulate our thoughts to create

different habits and actions…

Everybody can’t be saved..

But I am here to save as many of us as I can..

Who Am I?

A Self Esteem Coach

I am an empath

A Spiritual Advisor

A relationship Expert

and an Artist
Need to talk to me one on one? Drop me a line at salkis@iloveherart.com

And be sure to grab your free copy of my e-book: “What Kind Of Man DO You Have?”

Should We Stop Wearing Weaves?

“Everybody Wants to Look Better Than They Actually Are”
January 24, 2019 8:04 a.m.

Women wear WIGS to be more attractive, and Men wear 👉WOMEN to be more attractive..

Your Self Esteem Coach, Salkis Re


Everbody trying to look better than they actually are out here..

Shaming You is a Subjugation Tactic

I’ll tell you why Shaming women is so effective, it’s effective because we WANT to subjugated, we WANT to comply, we WANT to help, we WANT fairness.

And because we are by nature inclined to comply, these campaigns to make us feel worthless and nonsensical work because women are NOT negotiators.

I have never met a man yet who felt “shame” about what he liked have , be or do!! But women are put on blast accused of being unreasonable, impractical, delusional and emotionally unstable at every turn.

This is because men know that more times than not, we want give in, we’d rather have fairness than GET WHAT WE WANT..

Please stop taking men seriously


How Sway?

Please stop taking men seriously. It’s all a game, chess moves if you will. The way to get you to become a team player is by “leading” you and to lead you he has to show you that he knows what’s best for you.

He has to establish that his goals should be yours (this is what get you to open your legs for him before it safe or profitable to do so).

This is also why “showing” that you are smarter than him or 👉aggressively noncompliant is makes you unattractive in general to men..


Have your convictions and your boundaries set in STONE..

Your “Self Esteem Coach”

~Salkis Re

What Self Esteem NEVER IS!!

“What They See is NOT What You Are!”
Transmitted on January 23, 2019 7:43 a.m.

Self esteem has NOTHING to do with how you look!

You planned your look in the bathroom,
You rehearsed in your head people’s reactions and responses to how you look .


You’ve spent money to create an image in hopes that you can effectively make people think a certain way about you.

Your presentation is about MARKETING NOT SELF ESTEEM.

Look around you.


I know you know plenty of women who look attractive AND YET they have low self esteem.

You scratch your head and remain confused and maybe even resentful that a woman with all that beauty still find a herself inadequate or depressed.

You’d kill for her body, her pretty teeth and long natural hair..

Because you just can’t understand why she feels that way while looking so freaking gorgeous.
Lies…

Self image is the holy grail of all self help programs catering to Black women.

Change your hair and you’ll raise your self esteem.

Lose weight and you’ll increase your self esteem.

👉Date more men at the same time and you’ll feel less desperate so you can increase your self esteem.(Yes.. Who you date is about self image too)

Self image is NOT SELF Love!!!

Self image is an idea you create in your head, then you project outwardly for others to see so that they think a certain way about you…

👉👉👉Self image is all about who you want people to think you are, NOT what you think about about yourself!!


Your self esteem resides in the TOTAL acceptance what you NOT in how people see you…


“Your Self Esteem Coach”
~Salkis Re

Need help? Drop me a line at salkis@iloveherart.com

Self Esteem Coach, Artist, Author, Poet: Salkis Re

So You Wanna be a Sister Wife???

A viewer came to me expressing her desire to be a sister-wife..
Here’s what I shared with her:

I have not seen any long term success with it anyone really.

Not sure what it is but it seems like that relationship dynamic has a high

turnover rate and the lifespan is usually 2 years no more than 5 years if you are lucky. 

black women sister wives
With your Host, Self Esteem Coach, Salkis Re

The ones that have babies will be motivated to stick it out as longer

but not with heavy indoctrination from the husband.

He will tell you that you are “smarter” than other women for accepting

this way of life, that you are intelligent and pragmatic and in tune

with nature, that you lack selfishness and material greed like those other women out there (who get his d^&k hard)

and your title of Queen is repetitively used to stroke your ego and to assure you of your special place (that none of his other women have) in his life.

Inserts sarcasm right about now!

Self esteem Coach, Salkis Re

You want to know the truth?

Only Unattractive Women Fall for this!!

Most women that do this or get picked for this sort of relationship style are usually unattractive or insecure women.

Well not “or” because women you are one are usually the other too.

I don’t know what you don’t like about yourself.

Maybe it’s your age or your gap teeth, or the cellulite on your thighs thats got you settling for this rank and file lifestyle.

Maybe this is all you can really get in the grand scope of things

But what I want to know, all I want to know is if you are doing it because HE told you that this is what you are worth,

or because you have given yourself a brutally honest evaluation and this is what you feel will bring you peace and some semblance of joy…

The clock is ticking my dear..

No more time for bluffing yourself. What do YOU want?

Your Self esteem Coach, Salkis Re

TALK TO ME!

Regrets For Not Pulling The Trigger

“Again”
Written by Salkis Re

When you realize 
that you could’ve done 
what you didn’t do.
Then you come back around  
to vow that you’ll follow through.
Then you wait cause it’s not the perfect time,
but then you wait so long
that again you change your mind.
Then your mind reminds yourself of it again,
but you still do nothing for fear you cannot win.
And then when you’ve reached 
the end of your road
you regret that you’ve listened 
to what you were told.
And then you feel it’s too late to make amends
but your dreams could care less, 
for they come to your mind again.. 

“Mistress of Words”
~Salkis Re
Art by Salkis Re
Painting: “Light Up”

“You have to do what you are called to do when you are called to do it. Otherwise you forget why you wanted to do it or think your can’t do it. ” ~Salkis Re

“Light Up” Abstract Portrait Painting by Salkis Re

There is nothing worst in this world than living with the possibility that you could have been everything you wanted to be, but were to scared to attempt to be it..

Don’t be afraid to fail. Afraid to try. Afraid that you you’ll find out you can’t do it. All of that is a part of living..

I am a Self Esteem Coach, Artist, Author, Poet..

If you need to talk to me, please contact me here