In response to a you tube video I did yesterday discussing what to do if you are an unattractive girl as far as dating etc. A brother asked if it is wrong for him to pursue a woman he is not physically attracted too. He said that the woman has other qualities that he is interested in but the looks just don’t do it for him.
There is nothing wrong in dating someone you do not find attractive. Sometimes other traits do hold so much value that you can’t pass it up. The problem is when the other person has to develop a relationship with someone who is turned off by them physically.
If you are on the receiving end of that kind of union and you are NOT strong minded and strong willed, you WILL be treated like a charity case. The emotional high that is usually there with physical attraction, will not be there with you. Practicality rules, the bottom line will be in front every decision instead of pleasing you. You must develop mental strength here because lipstick won’t do much to create the illusion of attractiveness.
Neediness, even in attractive women, eventually becomes a repellant for her as well. You must develop independent thought. That is the only way to control a relationship were the other person thinks you are ugly. We can try to create the illusion of attractiveness by the right clothes and make up lessons, talking softly or learning poll dancing and other “body conscious” things that take your money before you have a chance to perfect them. But in the back of your mind(where the truth is) you know that no matter what you do, it’s not going to be enough if you are doing them to please another person.
You are in a charitable head space, a servant and master paradigm were you have decided to agree with the rank and file you have been placed in by the person that you are trying to please. Center yourself, Learn to please yourself and do things that build on the strengths that you already have. This is what will give you confidence, not worrying and pressing yourself to do and learn things that are only motivated by your need to distract from how you look.
You could be a master of your life if you know how to fill your own cup. Being unemotional makes you attractive!!
When you don’t “need” on an emotional level, you simply cannot be manipulated no matter how plain you look. And this alone can make you a magnet for men. Focus on health and personal accomplishments to avoid the depression that comes from pleasing people that find you undesirable to begin with..
(I know you men read my stuff so this goes for you too: your welcome 😉
“Your Life Coach ” ~ Salkis Re
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