So I’ve been hammering at the point of arresting the worry
and self doubt you may harbor over how you look.
I have had to battle with my self esteem for most of my life.
I did things to try to fit on, to try to e liked, try to be LOVED..
And there was nothing that is DID that actually helped me experience self love.
Nothing aesthetically I mean…
I had to find a way to compensate for my visual shortcomings.
So at some point I had to find a way to compensate for my visual shortcomings.
I became a hair stylist and worked hard until I had my own salon,
I made women beautiful for a living.
And I wanted to make women beautiful for a living because I thought
that if I surrounded myself with beautiful women,
then somehow their beauty would rub off on me..
Nothing rubbed off. Not one damn smear!
But what happened was that I began to be an ear for the stories of my clients. I began to me the counselor and the beauty consultant and the priest and the mother a lot of these women needed.
It opened my eyes to things, to notions I had about certain “types’ of women.
I came to a conclusion that none of us have it necessarily ‘better” than others of us.
Same pain different face.
Same worry, pretty face.
Same rejection, nice body..
What an eye opener is was when I started becoming more interested in their stories than putting conditioner in their hair..
I was hooked!
I had another calling I didn’t realize was inside of my heart.
Something that had nothing to do with superficial pretty and more to
do with healing the heart and stabilizing the emotions and the ramblings of the mind.
Maybe you need someone to talk too..
Maybe you haven’t had the best relationship with your mother and you desperately need some wisdom and help in making decisions in your life..
This is why I paint, why I write, why I consult and console women..
I need your attention.
I need for you to understand the messages I convey.
because I truly believe, with all my heart,
that what I give in the way of advice and creativity can
change your perspective of your value, your purpose, your desires..
Written by Salkis Re
Nobody has a problem rating others
until it is time to rate themselves.
Beauty then becomes speculative
as they disregard
what their own mirror tells.
All of a sudden
when the tables turn on you
you want kindness and understanding,
but asked to rate anybody else
you don’t see your words as reprimanding.
So I choose not to play
with your head games
and just walk a path of my own.
And Never again
will I look to others
to confirm what I’ve always known.
This road will be a lonely one
as I abandon all those fake friends,
and all these family members
who make assume I could
be vulnerable with them.
I will put flowers in my hair
and let sun’s rays be my biggest fan.
And finally sit down
surrounded by nature
no longer needing
them to love me as I am.
Mistress of Words
Art by Salkis Re
Painting: “Tune In”
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