Black Women Least Wanted?

So one of my clients admitted to me that we went to consult with a make dating coach.

She said that he told her that his clientele want lightskin women exclusively and wanted to know my take on the matter.

She specifically wanted me to respond to this as I’ve been telling black women to stop the foolish thinking that look ack men do not want us.

Here was my response:

And I say that he is right as a “rule” about his evaluation of “his” clientele. But he is not telling the “law” about all black men wanting light skin women. There’s a difference between being “rule” and being “law”.

There are exceptions to the “rule” which means he is incapable of supplying you with the absolute “law” of what every black man wants.
And you have to start asking yourself what was the motive and goal was for him to tell you that unless you were trying to be or ARE a client of his and he was telling you in a roundabout way that he can’t help you.
Conversations like these are dangerous for the mind to absorb because it becomes your script and your testimony and the fallguy for the reasons why you put off self evaluation and self improvement.
Everywhere we turn, people gloat over telling us that we are unwanted..
But it NOT a LAW until we believe it!

It would seem to me at this point that darkskin women

want me to add to the doom and gloom narrative because when I tell “US” that it’s not fact, I get the they said and he said and she said to discredit the thought process I want us to adopt collectively.

Your results are not based on what black men want or what a relationship coach tells you that ‘his’ clients want.

Your results are based on your perception of your reality which is just another way of saying “your beliefs”.
Low self esteem and fear of judgement (WHICH IS WHAT MOST WOMEN HAVE) produces “results”, NOT statistics or public opinion.
PERIDOT!

If you need to speak to me privately please contact me at info@salkisre.com

Black Womens Love Affair With Self Doubt

So today was a weird day. I had an Instagram follower leave a comment under one of my videos and in her statement she gave a plug to another #lifecoach and directed my followers to seek out my completion for spiritual coaching.

I was like really? Like you don’t know that you were being disrespectful hell?

I did heart the comment because I knew she was sincerely plugging another coach who helped, and I’m all for progress and breakthroughs even if I had nothing to do with it.

But this is what I do for my livelihood. This what I do for FREE with all my social media content too.

She put me a tight box.

She insinuate that I’m a life coach exclusively for darkskin women and a great artist while the person she was endorsing is a metaphysician and a solutions based spiritual coach..

Uh…. ok..

So the space that I’ve created to secrete wisdom is now a free for all with no regard for business etiquette?!

She deleted her comment after apologizing when I asked her if the plan was to cross promote.

“I didn’t mean to desrepect you Salkis.

I truly was only trying to help and we need to come together and support all black women.

And I agree with as the theory she knew it to be because rather than reciprocate her sentiments on the other coaches’s channel as I suggested, she bailed and deleted the comment as a cop out!

She understood that it was inappropriate to do that on the other girl’s profile but wanted to feed the bullshyte about sticking together and helping each other.

In one fell swoop, she declassified me and relegated me to a subpar category to massage her ego and her need to “matter”.

Not solution based?

Why?

Because I don’t tell women lies and inflate their egos with flattery and more lies for them to believe in?

Because I tell women to get rid of their addiction to vanity and totally divorce themselves from validation based on looks?

Because I say that friendship as it’s defined does not exist because it brings a delusion of honesty and ownership that women violate at the drop of hat?

All harsh truths…

But truths nonetheless.

And life changing perspectives that will unblock you emotionally and grow your resolve and fortitude.

And you just like me, must be ok with rejection, with being misunderstood and even disrespected.

I fight with formalities and prejudices of and from black women every single day of my life.

Put into a category based on what I look like, NOT what I say.

Women predetermine what they feel I should focus on based on what I look like.

It is what it is..

And everyone will get it wrong until you assert yourself and course correct those that you have to see more than once in your life.

If you are ready for a real and RAW breakthrough then get in touch with me at info@salkisre.com

Darkskin Girl Looks

A man told me that I wasn’t ugly. He said that when he heard me address myself as ugly, he took my picture to his friends to discuss my eating. They came the the conclusion that I’m a 5 or 5.5 for sure which is average NOT ugly.

He mentioned that even babies are attracted and respond better to attractive people, so this is intrinsic to what we all search for in a mate.

I Was Rate a 5 star *Average

I told this “It ok. I understand  what you are  attempting  to do, but I AM an ugly girl!” I own that because actually gives me COMPLETE emotional autonomy over the desire to be DESIRED by men..

The reason we women who are members  of the UGC understand the necessity of claiming the word Ugly is because it destroys another’s person’s power to emotionally manipulate and physically control you.

They Classified Us As Ugly

I saw this picture of these two girls. These are young ladies from the 70’s and based on our society, they would be classified as below average looking.

But I see “pureness” in their faces. I see agreeableness and sweetness and love it it’s natural form. But these girls would be targets for predators and pimps and simps today simply because they are basic black girls who live modest lives…

I fight for girls like them. I advocate for them because I  am/was just like them.

One of these days, you will understand

Darkskin Girls
Darkskin girls Are the BEST!

­

how important it is your your emotional wellbeing to divorce yourself from the NEED to be sexually  objectified by society. We <Black Girls> are already on the bottom of the social hierarchy and leading with sexual objectively gives predators your vagina wrapped in a nice little bow for no work at all!

Black and SWEEEET is what you should be. Not sexy. Not “attractive”. Think of yourself energetically…

What energy do you posses?

If you need my help and need someone to help you work through self esteem and self awareness issues, please contact me at:

Info@salkisre.com

My websites are:

www.theuglygirlsclub.com

www.iloveherart.com

Black Girls Want to Rock Too!

If you wait on people to accept who and what you are, you’ll be waiting a life time to get it.

And I you manage to get it, you’ll son realize it wasn’t worth the wait to begin with.

 

I have always made it a point extend an olive branch to other women of all shapes and sizes and colors

so that I wouldn’t be classified as bitter or insecure over other women.

 

But the conclusion I’ve reached is that it doesn’t matter if you say hello first,

if you give first,

if you offer friendship or understanding first, all people see is COLOR.

“La Petite Moor”

 

As A black woman, that’s all I’ve been all my life: BLACK 

My talents, my wisdom or anything else I had of value always took a back seat to how I looked.

 

Even in the art world, there are private discussions about what “type” of work sells and WHO can sell it,

and I was advised on several occasions not to do the “Black Girl” thing cause it’s not what black people want to see.

Some hard conclusion arose though.

African Art
“La Negra”

And it wasn’t that black girls don’t sell, its that black girls created by black girls don’t move as fast.

I’ve seen white artists paint black girls, pitch black girls in folk art style on old doors and other eclectic stuff,

some of which can be misconstrued as “Coonery” and BLACK PEOPLE bought their art.

 

I’ve seen white women do paintings exclusively of black women who decide to keep themselves inconspicuous

and BLACK PEOPLE BUY THEIR WORK too!

 

And here I am, and actual black woman

And here I am, and actual black woman concerned about the politics of painting dark skin women because

I didn’t want to be misconstrued as a “hater”….

Imagine that?

Telling my story and worried about acceptance when everybody else can enjoy

( without scrutiny) what they prefer to paint for whatever reason they choose to paint it.

“I Don’t Know”

Everybody Can DO What They Want to Do Except Me??

Everyone else gets to enjoy the novelty of it all, but I need sensible reasons for why I do what I do?

No More…

 

It’s a New Day..

And Im here to tell OUR STORY through the faces of Dark skin women.

I won’t say that I’ll never paint another complexion again because I will,

but the FOCUS now is on Black Girl Magic.

To see the entire collection and buy something sweet. for you or someone you love, go to www.iloveherart.com

Sanaa Says Marriage Ain’t That Important!

 

 

 

Sanaa Lathan And marriage
Taylor Rooks and Sanaa Lathan at CultureCon event,

 

A WEIRD obsession that black women have to get married??

Why is a woman wanting to get married now classified as a weird obsession??

Sanaa goes on to say that the divorce rate is over 50% and she doesn’t invest in anything that has such low odds..

She went on to say that black women are being pressured into marriage as well.

 

So we are pressured to get married and have a weird obsession with it as well.

Hmmm…

 

Well I will say this. With 72% of all black births from 2015 were from non married black women, how successful is this pressure on black women to get married???

 

Only 25% of Black Are Married??

Among currently married adults between the ages of 15 to 44 only 26 percent of black women were married, 45 percent of Hispanic women were married and 51 percent of white women were married (Goodwin, Mosher, and Chandra 2010

 

Over the life course, Blacks are the least likely of all racial groups to ever marry (Parker and Wang 2014).

 

We cannot subscribe to this feminism agenda.. Sanaa comes from a privileged background.

 

She is financially independent, childless and almost 50 years old. Good genetics has afforded her steady marketability with her industry BUT in real life, she would be considered a woman who has HIT A WALL.

 

Sanaa Lathan and ex Boyfriend Tyrese
Sanaa Lathan and ex Boyfriend Tyrese

Putting Marriage Last?

Putting yourself first is fabulous, and I support that 100%, but if you are unable

to have found and experienced a life partnership at almost 50 years old,

there is a probability that there is some mental instability or just narcissistic or extreme selfishness at play here.

 

There are no men dragging black women down the isle and the girlfriends of

black women are supporters, accomplices, providers of alibis

for black women who find it a more attainable goal to f*CK for money and fun and babies instead of marriage.

 

Image result for dr phil valentine
“Women want POWER not Equality or Responsibility”~ DR Phil Valentine

That’s a problem.

To insinuate that a black woman is emotionally unstable because she earnestly wants a life partner is parasitic

in scope and an enemy to the structure of the family and our race in general.

 

The Problem With Our Black MEN

The problem we are having now is a lack of warriors and men to reset the order of society and men in general are not problem solvers. Men offer no solutions, no protection and no provisions for the black woman.

 

Therefore, black women have become their own protectors, their own providers, they educate their children on their own which leaves a residue of low self worth, hopelessness and suspiciousness of the intentions and the efficiency of black men altogether.

 

So This post is about becoming clear about what our collective aim is as black women. And we don’t need black women who have “given Up” on the goal of sacred unions to be the voice for the young black women coming up who SHAMED now  for even wanting to be marriage from women who can’t get a man to stay with them long enough to ask!

 

Salkis Re is an artist, author, poet, relationship expert, CowGirl, Life Coach and the founder of

The Ugly Girl’s Club

When she is slapping paint on a canvas, she’s helping women across the globe heal emotionally from toxic relationships and societal conditioning.. Visit her art site too iLoveHerArt.com

Kanye is Saved, Kim Kardashian is NOT??

So Yeezy wants his beautiful wife to stop dressing sexy because he has

finally realized that it was “Affecting My Soul” as he puts expressed in a reality T.V. video circulating around social media.

A lot of women weighed in on the matter with many of them saying that he basically got what he paid for.

With the recent surface of his “Sunday Best” choir church service type concerts,

I think Kanye is shifting into spirituality which seems to be helping him find a moral compass of his own.

I think that we have to make room for people to change or revolve when in a relationship,

but this situation is tricky because he got with her because he was attracted to the whore archetype she displayed.

Kim K’s brand IS HER BODY! This is how she has made a fortune and it essentially Is her “talent” so to speak.

To require someone like her to stop doing what even brought him to her yard, would prove a disaster for business model.

He is looking for a deeper connection with his wife now.
The vixen, whore, sexy arch is played out in his mind and he finally sees it for what it is..

But honestly, I think this is a full circle for Kanye.
It’s just “Jesus Walks With Me” all over again for him..

Kanye West Praying on Sunday
Running from who he as always been is over and he in finally getting to do music with a meaning and a spiritual base.

This fits neatly with my point about leading with your sexuality.

It gets old ladies, and for some of us , it spoils like milk.

Kim enjoyed a long run with the shenanigans, but I think she should follow her man’s lead.

Kanye West Sundays Best
Kayne West At His Sunday Service

I think he is also sensing that she is hitting a wall now, too old for the vixen shyte and the booty must be going through changes underneath those body shapers, but he loves her.

So he’s like hey: ” We did that! Now I want you to be my “First Lady”

and we could ride this wave until the wheels fall off, and go to heaven when its all over..

Tell me what ya’ll think about this. I’d love to hear what you ladies and gents have to say about this matter!

Watch the Video OF Kayne Telling Kim What He Thinks

Salkis Re is an artist, author, poet, relationship expert, CowGirl, Life Coach and the founder of

The Ugly Girl’s Club

When she is slapping paint on a canvas, she’s helping women across the globe heal emotionally from toxic relationships and societal conditioning.. Visit her art site too iLoveHerArt.com

Jason Pope Black Girl Pimpin

Jason Pope

White Guy Lures Black Women for Sex

This news story came across my newsfeed on facebook two days ago.

Apparently this white man Jason Pope, also known as DJ KID, has been enticing black women and minors to have sex with him in exchange for concert tickets and other medial trinkets for years.

He is an accused pedophile who has been rumored to have exposed over 600 black women to HIV also.

What’s more is that he has been arrested and charged with sex trafficking minors and has a non sexually related criminal history going all the way back to 1995.

Jason Pope
Jason Pope, Aka DJ KID

 

He BlackMailed One of His Victims

He had blackmailed an underage victim in 2017 and pressured her into performing sex acts after she left him for two weeks.

He then proceeded to trash her all over social media when he couldn’t get her to comply.

Six months later, this same victim’s mother alerted deputies that Pope was luring girls for sex off of Facebook and Snapchat by promising prizes..

So apparently this creep would pay these girls for sex then talk about the experience on social media to entertain his followers.

 

 

Dark Skin Women, Unloved Everywhere

I think what disturbs me the most about this is that he strategically targeted dark skin black girls 

and women to solicit sex for money.

Every picture I’ve seen to date with this criminal has been in the arms of a dark skin black woman.

Reading and viewing the commentary about the pictures, I’ve heard these women described as “Duties”, Section 8 Recipients and Monkeys for the most part.

Jason Pope

Speaking as a Dark skin black woman myself, I know all too well the underlying bias and prejudice that society has for us. We are the rejects even amongst our own people, the throwaways of society if you will.

And I warn black women to stop sexualizing themselves and making themselves agreeable and available to men for pleasure or a few coins.

When you are considered unattractive, there’s no moral instinct in a man to not want to harm you.

And that is the cold, hard, facts of life.

 

 

Leave Vanity ALONE

The women I coach get an earful of that medicine because I want them to be aware and prepared emotionally so that they can resist the emotional mind f*(k  people, BOTH MALE AND FEMALE with play on them.

Dark skin women are always used for sexploitation because we are like animals to men in our society whether they are white OR black.

 

And this is why I telling all my black Doves, my clients, to LEAVE VANITY ALONE.

Women end up in the arms of men like this fool because you are seeking validation and a sense of self worth that you feel only a man can give you.

You want to be wanted, even if it’s only for sex.

And the temporary affection you get during the sex act satisfies a need to feel loved. But it also puts you in harms way. You can destroy your life while chasing a fantasy. And the sorrowful part about many of us ark skin women is that we turn to sexual freedom experience worthiness and the only attention many of us get is sexual attention.

It’s a GAME, and men will play with you LIFE if you let them.

Don’t give any man the authority to affirm you, to upgrade you, to give you an identity.

Your life is your responsibility. Clean it it. Clean yourself of the filthy thoughts of low self worth through RIGHT ACTION.

 

 

Salkis Re is an artist, author, poet, relationship expert, CowGirl, Life Coach and the founder of The Ugly Girl’s Club

When she is slapping paint on a canvas, she’s helping women across the globe heal emotionally from toxic relationships and societal conditioning.. Visit her art site too iLoveHerArt.com

Colorism: The Sister to Racism

 

The conversation around colorism is hitting a fever pitch now. I just read an article about Lupita and her experiences with colorism while growing up in Kenya and then seperation by color when she moved to the U.S. She said: “Colorism is the Daughter to Racism“.

And she suffered from self worth issues and wished her skin was a different shade. Now she is contributing to the mental wellness of our black girls with her new book, “Sulwe” which is a book to encourage love of skin and beauty within..

This Evelyn Lozada and OG beef

This Evelyn Lozada and OG beef which also includes accusations of favoritism do to skin tone has got viewers upset about preferential treatment Lozada had received even though she is arguably the most “aggressive” and “violent” cast member on that show. She insinuated that OG, a darkskinned African woman, was a monkey. She repeated called her UGLY and “DIRTY” on the show but Shawnie has called OG “aggressive” on the show.

The thing I find with colorist reviews is that I’ve these negative “racist” terminology from pretty much “EVERYONE” out here.

I’ve worked in the beauty field for over 20 years and watched how mothers talked about their “nappy-headed” daughters and mates notation of how this one didn’t get the “good hair” or that the other daughter was “the pretty one”/

I’ve seen so-called “friends” make colorist statements about their “friends” by calling them  “black bytches” and “ashy S.O.B’s” and all manner of derogatory colorist statements were hurled all over the place.

Black Beauty in America
“Claudine’s Hotcomb Blues” Art by salkis Re

I’ve listened as women clowned their Dark skin boyfriends or husbands and the word “nigger” or “black mother fockker”, “crusty arse nigger” or “field niggas” was used to describe a man who either didn’t know or didn’t care that he was getting scammed for his money.

I told my little black doves about the biases in place that support a low value narrative where we are concerned.

 

I said that they think black women are: Aggressive, Dirty, Masculine, Unlovable, Unintelligent, Bitter, Impoverished….

And these notions will often times come right your own home, from people you love and respect…

Colorism in America
Evelyn Lozada’s Racist tweets Against Cats member

Colorism is a fight from within AND without

Colorism is a fight from within AND without. It is in your backyard, at your workplace, it might even be that penis you welcome into your birth canal...

So you have to change your energy.

STOP giving emotional support (envy, mimicry, jealousy, admiration, commerce) To people who do not reciprocate emotional and monetary value towards you.

It’s YOU who WORSHIPS their image and cries unfair treatment later.

YOU don’t pedestalize people who look like YOU.

Why?

Because you want to be them, be accepted by them, be admired by them and you feel that you have to be LIKE THEM to experience that..

Change your energy.

Do not exert emotional energy to ANYONE who does not INSTINCTIVELY reciprocate it to you.
PERIODT

“Liberator of the Breath of Re”
~Salkis Re

 

Beautiful Black Women in relationships

Salkis Re is an artist, author, poet, relationship expert, CowGirl, Life Coach and the founder of The Ugly Girl’s Club

When she is slapping paint on a canvas, she’s helping women across the globe heal emotionally from toxic relationships and societal conditioning.. Visit her art site too iLoveHerArt.com

Are You Clowning Yourself?

African Art by Salkis Re; Clowns
Salkis Re, Artist, Author, Poet

Are You A Clown?

I was one for most of my life. Trying hard to make people laugh and smile and like me.

Masking how I truly felt for fear of experiencing rejection and loneliness.

The more I tried, the more invisible I felt as I never got what I wanted.

Some of us are used for the entertainment of others who never seem to feel an inclination to reciprocate the generosity and care they’ve received.

I came to the conclusion that being kind wasn’t the way to get love. I figured out that being selfless wasn’t the way to want he hearts of others..

What would give me a quality experience when interacting with other souls is to LOVE MYSELF.

Joaquin Phoenix

Are you playing the Clown in real life?

Are you doing things for laughs and cheers at the expense of your ideals and self esteem?

Are you afraid to ask for what you need from those whom you give too?

Then you are playing a clown, and it’s time to stop entertaining people at the cost of your identity.

 

Energy is EVERYTHING..

The respect you want to enjoy requires ENERGY.

The love you want to experience requires energy.

What signal are you sending out into the world?

What are you eating to support your cells and organs?

What are you thinking in order to change the way your genes express themselves?

Joker Abstract Art , African Art, Cowns, Scary Clown, Sad Clown
“Joker” Original Art by Salkis Re

Feeling good about who you are requires new thought patterns and a new environment to support a new thought.

You ever rearrange the furniture in your bedroom and feel like its a brand new room? That the same concept needed to change the results you get in your life. Rearrange your thoughts by manipulating your environment.

The game of life and abundance and wellness is about about changing your perception of your reality.

feel love permeate through your body. When you go out the door, breathe deeply and think positively about yourself.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Salkis Re is an artist, author, poet, relationship expert, CowGirl, Life Coach and the founder of The Ugly Girl’s Club

When she is slapping paint on a canvas, she’s helping women across the globe heal emotionally from toxic relationships and societal conditioning.. Visit her art site too iLoveHerArt.com

Prepare for Lovemaking

Abstract African Art
“I Don’t Know” Original art by Salkis Re

 

“I Don’t Know”
Written by
Salkis Re

I’m sitting here
about to do something,
yet I’m not sure just what to do.
You did say you loved me
And that is your word,
and that’s all I have as proof.

Standing here helpless,
yet hopeful all the same.
Praying that I don’t leave this room
with cause for feeling shame.

Nervous I may be
but grateful nonetheless.
And all I ask of you is to care
for my heart and all I’m about to bare.
~
Salkis Re
Art by Salkis Re
Painting: “I Don’t Know”

 

Do the best you can in making decisions for yourself concerning sex. It is nothing to take lightly. It is nothing to assume exclusively for pleasure. Your entire life is at stake. And the man you allow to entire your woman should be fully aware that you feel that serious about it..

Periodt!

 

 

Salkis Re is an artist, author, poet, relationship expert, CowGirl, Life Coach and the founder of The Ugly Girl’s Club

When she is slapping paint on a canvas, she’s helping women across the globe heal emotionally from toxic relationships and societal conditioning.. Visit her art site too iLoveHerArt.com